


Part Of Me

by RivaMika_Ackerman



Series: The Point Of My Life [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Krista Lenz | Historia Reiss/Eren Yeager - Freeform, Love Affair, Minor Armin Arlert/Annie Leonhart, Modern AU, One-Sided Levi/Petra Ral
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-24
Updated: 2014-09-27
Packaged: 2018-02-10 05:40:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 37,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2013087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RivaMika_Ackerman/pseuds/RivaMika_Ackerman
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mikasa, a 24 years old woman, gets in a relationship with Levi, an engaged man, after they met in a hotel. Fantasy and hesitation, followed by seduction and temptation, growing to be irresistible, and reflects into acts of lust and need with a touch of love that remained shut within their hearts. [Levi x Mikasa/RivaMika, One-sided!Levi x Petra/Rivetra]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Revival

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired from the song Part Of Me by Katy Perry, was originally written for the Resident Evil fandom. After joining the SNK fandom, I thought the plot was perfect for it, so here it is, have a good read.

**Genre:**   _Romance, Angst, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Humor._

 **Rate:**   _T (For now, will be changed to a higher ranking later on)_

 **Main Pair:**   _Rivaille/Levi x Mikasa [RivaMika/LeviMika]._

 **Side Pairs:** _One-sided!_   _Rivaille/Levi x Petra [Rivetra/Levitra], Armin x Annie [AruAni], Eren x Krista/Historia [EreKuri/Erestoria]._

* * *

 **_Part I:_ ** _Revival_

Sunday, June 3rd, 2012. At 9:30 am, a parked car was settled near a hotel, while a young woman with long black hair and narrowed, dark-gray eyes fixed up at a figure, was leaning against it. A ring slipped from her finger, falling soundlessly until it hit the ground, rolling in its place before lulling to a stop. Once the material was discarded, the woman shifted her wait to get inside the car, driving away in a rush.

The passe apartment she lived in was about half an hour away, and once her feet stepped in, the door slammed shut wrathfully and her back pressed against it for support. Her feet seemed helpless to carry her any further, her eyes were lost in an ambiguous world until the sound of her phone ringing dragged her out of her illusions. Her hand was almost lost in the small handbag before touching it and pulling it out. Tawdriness filled her eyes once they reflected the name on her phone's screen.

"Just go to hell!" Her lips heavily parted to let out those words in the most broken voice she could ever speak in. Her phone was in no time flying towards the mirror in front of her, falling apart into pieces, scattered around the floor, and the mirror was signed with a long scar.

Pushing through her godforsaken hopes, she managed to enter the bathroom. Her hands held onto the edges of the washbasin in refusal to submit to the weakness of her legs and fall, filling it with some papers she had in her handbag and ripping them with shaky fingers. A lighter was all she needed next to set the fire in the papers, and once they caught fire, her eyes drove up to the mirror. She could see nothing but a dead, soulless girl.

* * *

Around 10 pm, the same day, consciousness was tugging on her eyelids to open. Her senseless body clueless on the surroundings.

"…Huh?!" Her eyes revealed the unrecognizable ceiling, and the field of the unrecognizable things only expanded when she looked around.

"Mikasa!…Darling, are you okay?" A worried voice of a woman reached her ears. Turning to her right, the blurry sight vanished, and the figure of her mother sitting near her was clearly visible.

"What are you doing here?" Not so warm welcoming words to say to her mother, and neither the glares in her eyes were welcoming.

"How are you feeling?" Her mother hid her outraged features behind more concerned ones. Her eyes screaming with worry about her daughter's health.

"Who even told you I was in the hospital?" Anger and ire were all Mikasa's voice held towards her mother in return.

"…Your neighbor." The mother gave her an answer to shut her curiosity.

"…That babbling bitch," Gritting her teeth, Mikasa's eyes fixed on the window. She would prefer even looking at a wall for the rest of her life and not her mother.

"Sweetie, why haven't you told me? I could help—…" Her mother's words were still tender-hearted as she spoke.

"Thanks mom, I guess I'm old enough to help myself." The harshness of Mikasa's words slaughtered her mother's susceptibilities, and Mikasa's eyes still refused to see what broken expression her mother would make.

"Good thing your neighbor called me, your father has no idea about anything yet, and he shouldn't know or else he's going to throw me in the streets—…" Swallowing her hurt tone, her mother said, to only get cut off by her daughter once more.

"Are you talking about my father, or your husband?" Mockingly, Mikasa muttered, honesty absent in her question.

"Mikasa! Don't talk to me like that," Now her mother used a warning tone as she spoke, running out of patience with her daughter's behavior, "you should be thankful I came to see you."

"Why would I be thankful to you?" With a raised eyebrow and an abrupt voice, Mikasa eyed her mother while saying, "What have you ever done for me?"

Her mother would argue, but she took in a deep breath instead and calmed herself "I'm not arguing with you now, and don't push yourself, it's not good for your health."

"Heh! Right…" Mikasa still wore those glares even if her mother's intensions held nothing but concern.

"Honey, I know this is going to be hard for you, and you have to be strong, you're going to get over it sooner than you think…" Her mother smiled lovingly at her, even though her eyes were screaming with sorrow and pain.

"Obviously I'm not whining and screaming about it." Mikasa exclaimed.

"Mikasa…" Her mother then took her hand in her tenderly, "are you going to be okay?" and asked with a frown.

"As long as there's nothing between me and that bastard anymore I'll be fine, and as long as you're leaving I'll be even better." Mikasa pulled her hand away and grumbled, annoyed by her mother's presence.

Hurt, her mother stood up and stared down at her, "I'll go back home now…" She said, her eyes waiting patiently for a small glimpse from her daughter, but she never got it. "Your friends are here, they came to check on you…they're coming in shortly, I'll visit you tomorrow and if you wanted me to get you anything….fruits…clothes? Just tell me…"

"Don't play the good mom, just leave…" That was all Mikasa ever wanted from her mother; to leave and never come back.

If her mother had any last hopes to gain her daughters love, they died at that moment, and even looking at her hurt because all she could see in those eyes of Mikasa was hatred, so she simply turned away and walked out the room.

* * *

In about a week, Mikasa's state became even, and she was at last able to leave the hospital, enjoying the sight of the city from her apartment's balcony, while sitting with her two friends, Krista and Annie, around a table.

"How do you feel now that you're finally back home?" Krista asked with a wide smile on her face.

"Free!" Mikasa chuckled resting both her cheeks on her palms.

"…We…missed your presence between us." Annie wasn't one to talk much, but she couldn't deny that she had missed her friend.

"Now you're going to stay with us and never leave, honey, you're now a single, independent young woman who got a lot of time to spend with her friends." Krista was one to cheer everyone up with her words and welcome them, comfort them when needed, and Mikasa was a dear friend to her.

Mikasa wouldn't help but agree with Krista's statement and nod at it, "Yeah, I am, and since I have a sick leave, I can hang out with you guys a lot."

Suddenly, the girls' attention was stolen to fix on the door when the bell rang.

"Oh, it's probably them, I'll go get that." Annie got up of her chair and walked to the door to open it, they had been expecting some more company, but before she would open the door, she wanted to mess around a little bit, "Who's there?"

"Thieves." A man answered from behind the door.

"And what do you want?" Annie smirked and rested her hand on the doorknob.

"We heard there are some sexy girls in this apartment, and we're here to kidnap them." Another guy stated jokingly, not really because there was no doubt; the girls were pretty.

"So thieves apparently ring the bells of the apartments they're planning to steal?" Annie crossed her arms against her chest and taunted.

"Annie, come on, open the door." A soft voice beat her will to go further in the game.

She simply shrugged and opened the door for Armin and Eren to come in, holding few pizza boxes and a bag of drinks.

"Hey." Annie took the bag from Armin's hand to help.

"Hi." Armin smiled and walked with her to the balcony, and she wrapped her hand around his waist.

"How's it?" Eren followed them from behind, bothered by the sight of Annie's hand around Armin's waist, and he couldn't help but pull them apart. "You guys can do that when I'm not around."

"Tch." Annie always enjoyed to tease Eren and so she wrapped her arm around Armin's waist again.

All three finally walked out to the balcony, to join Mikasa and Krista.

"Hello ladies." Eren said. "So we have five boxes of pizza, ten bottles of soda, can the party start now?"

"Of course." The excitement blew Krista's voice as she stood up to take the pizza boxes from Eren's hands.

"Mikasa, how are you feeling?" Armin looked down at his friend and asked.

"I wouldn't be here if I weren't okay." She reassured him.

He smiled warmly at her and rubbed her shoulder. "Welcome back."

"Oh, by the way, I have something for you, you can say it's a 'welcome back' present." Eren sneered softly.

"Eren, don't flatter yourself, we all helped to buy it." Krista glared at the tall boy.

"Okay, fine." He shrugged then placed a box down on the table in front of Mikasa, it was a cell phone box and her eyes widened when she saw it. "There." He snickered.

"Oh! A cell phone!" Her eyes roamed around to stare at every one of them before landing back at the box.

"You need one after…crushing yours." Krista could still remember how she kept finding the broken pieces of Mikasa's phone everywhere while cleaning up the mess she had made.

"And with a new chip, you don't wanna receive some unwanted calls." Annie added, hinting at someone Mikasa knew perfectly whom it was.

"Thank you," Mikasa had no better words to say to thank her friends, only at times like these she could tell who the real friends were that actually cared about her and helped her "I could have bought one myself, you shouldn't have bothered…"

"Shhh, no complains." Eren messed up her hair while interrupting her, she was like a sister to him, and she held a dear place in his heart.

"It's just a cell phone." Annie would always show less than what she actually felt, but everyone, including Mikasa, knew how much of a kind person she was.

"Our friendship is way more precious." Krista gave the girl a quick hug from behind and a kiss on the cheek, her words meant so much…so much for Mikasa.

* * *

_That was the beginning of my new life, I could say it was a turning point, because I've changed ever since then, and I became more confident of myself, especially that my friends were always there for me, helping me, and I could feel myself becoming a whole new person. My sick leave ended and I got back to my work, I kept myself busy as much as I could with work, doing the best I could, and my boss apparently noticed in a short while because he gave me a promotion, and I continued to work for six months until I finally had my vacation for a month, which I decided to spend away from the town…and my friends._

* * *

Night crawled into the sky and tented an endless dark cover patched with grey clouds hiding the shining stars behind them, the light of Mikasa's bedroom was on, she was sitting on her bed with Krista, helping her with packing her stuff, she had planned to leave the town temporarily so she could clear her thoughts and rest.

"Eren, this one is ready…Go take it down." Krista held a travelling-bag to Eren.

"Alright." He took it swiftly and left the apartment to take it down while the girls prepared another one.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Krista looked up and asked in an uncertain tone, she wouldn't want to be away from her friend, it felt as if she was leaving in a death trip, perhaps she was just exaggerating, but still.

"Yes." Confidence was confirmed in Mikasa tone, she had made a decision, and she wasn't going to change it.

"We'll miss you so much." Krista frowned, but soon killed that frown with a smile, at least Mikasa wasn't a broken soul anymore like she had been for the past months.

"It's just one month, I need to keep away for a while, but don't worry, I'll come back before Christmas night, and who knows? I might even bring someone with me." Mikasa chuckled while placing the clothes in the bag.

"Do you think you're ready to get in a new relationship?" Krista feared the possibility of her friend getting hurt again because of a guy, she had struggled all the past months to get through it, and Krista more than anyone else had hard times helping her with it.

"It's been six months, I got over it, Krista." Six months weren't that much of time, but Mikasa managed to get back her confidence and get over the pain, not that she forgot it, because she never would, but she learnt how to deal with it.

"I know but-…"

"I know what I'm doing very well, and this time I got everything under control, I will never be played around with again, ever." Her voice was firm, strong and so were her words, confident.

"I'm not going to stop you at all, but please, promise me that you won't go back to smoking and drinking when you're upset, while you're away." There was a pleading tone in Krista's voice, she couldn't count the nights she had found Mikasa drunk in the shower, neither could she count how many cigarettes she had smoked, it took her so long…so long to stop.

"Do I have to promise you?" She rubbed the back of her head hesitantly.

"Yes, unless you want me to pack my stuff and go with you." Krista vowed, she knew Mikasa way too well to trust her in such things.

"Heh! Fine." Mikasa was aware that arguing with Krista was useless, because she'd always end up submitting to what her friend says.

"No, I won't take 'Fine' I want you to say it, literally." She insisted, if Krista ever had a chance to make Mikasa sign some papers that guarantee her she would never go back to drinking and smoking, she'd have done that.

"I promise…." Mikasa mumbled almost quietly.

"What?"

"I promise that I won't go back to smoking or drinking when I'm upset. There, happy?" She faked anger.

"Good, now you can go without me." The two girls shared a laugh, an hour later they finally finished packing the bags, and moved them down to put them in Mikasa's car, where she was now sitting on the driver's seat, having Eren and Krista standing nearby, looking at the end of the street, sighing.

"Where the hell are they?" Mikasa asked, referring to Armin and Annie, she didn't want to leave before seeing them, but they were taking so long to arrive.

"They should be here shortly, well that's what they said…" Eren stared into the distance poker-faced, the two must be spending some lovey-dovey moments while they have bee, all waiting for them, but at last he could see them running towards the car.

"Ah! There they are." Krista saw them too.

"Sorry for being late…" Armin apologized once they stood with the friends, panting, they had been running for a while now in order to not arrive late.

"We were walking around and…" Annie explained.

"Oh! Really! You left me carrying all those bags by my own, you little bastards, my arms feel numb." Eren growled in anger.

"Anyway, this isn't the perfect timing to hear your complaints, we should say goodbye to Mikasa." Ignoring Eren, Annie turned to face Mikasa.

"Right…Mikasa." Eren then looked down at her and smiled. "Have a safe trip."

"As if I was leaving the country, what's wrong with you guys? I'm just leaving the town for a short while and then I'll come back." Mikasa shook her head at her friends, they were making it sound as if she was leaving and never coming back.

"Yes. But you're not going to be here and we'll miss you." Krista frowned lightly.

"I'll miss you too…" She couldn't help a sad smile from stealing her lips for a second.

"Don't you forget your promise." Krista glared warningly.

"I'll try not to…" Though Mikasa said it in a teasing tone, she was serious.

"Take care of yourself." Annie said calmly.

"Call us every day." Eren spoke in the overprotective brother tone.

"Tell us if there is anything new." Armin added.

"I will…" With a last nod, Mikasa waved goodbye at her friends, launching her drive to leave the town, no matter how much her friends had been helpful, a person would never realize how much they grew stronger until they're left alone in the battlefield, and that was the only intention she had, to figure out how strong she had gotten.

She had an early reservation at a five star hotel, reserving a suite for her own wouldn't hurt, would it? Sometimes, a person needs to indulge and love themselves, and she was going to have this vacation for herself and no one else.

The two hours drive finally came to an end when the car stopped at the hotel's grounds.

"Ah! Finally!…" With a tired exhale slipping from between her lips, her feet touched the rigid ground while her head peeked out the car's door, having now a pleasant sight of the huge building right before her eyes, and few seconds of musing wouldn't be a waste of time, it was a dreamlike scenery that caught her focus, she was never aware of the valet that had approached her until he spoke.

"Good evening, miss, would you like me to park your car?"The usual respectful tone was present in the valet's voice as he asked.

"Sure," She finally came to notice the man in front of her and said, "I just need to take out the bags I brought with me."

"Don't worry, miss, I'll make sure to send them with a bellboy, have a nice stay at our hotel." Bowing his head, Mikasa stepped aside for the valet to take her car and park it.

It was now time to explore the inside part of the hotel, and as if her feet had been nailed to the ground once she stepped into the lobby, the amazingly large lobby that stole her eyes for what felt like a never ending moment, until her gaze landed on the front desk, she then remembered that she had yet to check her reservation and her suite next, and she let her legs lead her to it.

"Good evening miss, and welcome to our hotel, how may I help you?" A wide smile showed on the receptionist's face as she welcomed Miksa.

"Hi, I have a reservation for today, under the name Ackerman…" Mikasa stepped closer and talked.

"Ackerman…" There was an obvious sign of confusion in her voice as the receptionist said, "Oh! Right," but she answered anyway, "yes miss Ackerman, we have reserved a suite for you for a month, am I correct?"

"Yes…" Relieved nothing went wrong with her reservation, she nodded.

"Alright, I see we already have your credit card information, so you only need to sign the receipt along the bottom, please." The receptionist said and Mikasa complied. "Thank you very much, miss. We've reserved suite 48 for you, here is the key…" She held the key out to her, "Take the elevator on the right, go to the fourth floor, turn right, walk straight, your suite will be on your left hand side, your bags should get there soon with the bellboy."

"Alright, thank you." Mikasa took the key and turned around, looking at the elevator she was going to take before walking towards it, following the receptionist's guides, Mikasa ended up in her suite within few minutes.

 _How Charming,_  the words she could not speak of when the mascot of her surroundings had her stunned in amazement.

"Miss, should I leave these here?" Before she would drown any further in her suite's fantasies, the bellboy called from behind, holding her travelling-bags and placing them on the ground.

She turned around and looked at him, giving him a nod, "Ah yes. Just leave them there, I'll arrange them later."

"If you needed anything just call the room service, have a nice stay." The bellboy said before leaving and closing the door behind him.

It was now only her and a whole big suite for her to explore, throwing her handbag to the couch, Mikasa began wandering around, mesmerized by the fanciness of the place, her dreams bedroom was behind one of the doors that was soon revealed when she opened it, a big bad caught her eyes, and next thing she knew, she jumped to it like a little child.

"It's not bad to enjoy myself at all!" Mikasa stretched her numb arms after the long tiring drive she had had, and relaxed for few more minutes.

The restaurant was no less charming, having her dinner dear was a stroke of luck because of the lack of the empty tables, even luckier because the table she reserved was the last, she found it amusing how the waiters kept apologizing for it and promising to buy more tables as soon as possible, but on the other hand, it only was proving how much this hotel was a big success. All she ever needed to get the fondness she deserved, relaxing and having fun weren't something she'd usually get, but now she was open to everything new, the smell of food kept tickling her nostrils, and so she ignored whatever kept her busy from eating, her eyes would land on her plate when her hands held the fork, but a man with a young woman wrapping her hand around his stole her sight as they walked into the restaurant, standing by her.

"Oh! Apparently all the tables are reserved…" The man frowned lightly, seeming unable to spot an empty table for them, he had a dark brown hair with an undercut, and he stood in a black suit next to the woman with him.

"No, honey, there should be at least one unoccupied table." The shorter woman with him said hopingly, her light ginger bangs covered one of her eyes and her hand reached to push them back stoically, she wore an eggshell coat to her thighs, with a black tight and boots.

"Good evening, sir. Um! If you wanted to reserve a table could you please for a bit until someone finishes their dinner, because all the tables are reserved for now." A waiter approached them and bowed his head apologizing to them.

"Oh! That's not a good thing to hear." The girl heaved a sigh and tugged on the man's cuffs.

"We just got here from a long drive and we didn't have dinner yet." The man explained.

"If you have reserved a room in our hotel earlier, then please, go to your room and we'll make sure to bring you the dinner shortly." The waiter had no better suggestions to grant.

"Yes we have a reservation but-…" The man was about to say when he was suddenly interrupted.

"My table is almost empty…" Mikasa barely recognized herself while saying so, for she was known of her nonchalance, she was being rather kind, "If you'd like, you can join me?"

The man exchanged gazes with the girl in his company for few seconds, "So, what do you say?" He asked her.

"I say that I cannot wait any longer." The girl couldn't help a giggle, and a light blush from reddening her cheeks.

"Alright, we're going to sit here with the miss." The man told the waiter as he helped the girl take her seat.

"What should I get you, sir?" The waiter asked, holding out the menu to the man.

"Same thing she ordered, it doesn't matter, we're hungry and we could even eat you up right now." The man said mockingly, anything edible would do to shut their hunger right now, and the waiter nodded then headed off. "Good evening, miss." His eyes finally met Mikasa's.

"Good evening." Mikasa replied and settled the fork down on the table, giving some attention to her guests.

"Thank you for letting us join you." The woman kept her poise as she said.

"Oh, there's no need to thank me," Shaking her head, Mikasa forced a smile on her lips, to only realize how hard it is to smile at strangers, and that the receptionist deserved an award for doing such a great job and making it sound easier than it actually was. "it would be a waste for places…there's enough space for more people to sit and well, at least I'll have some company." She still tried to sound nice.

"By the way, I'm Petra…" The woman proceeded to introduce herself, perhaps knowing their names would make it slightly comfortable? She held her hand out to her for a handshake, Mikasa responded to it, "and this is…"

"Levi." The man finished her words and shook hands with Mikasa.

"Pleasure to meet you, I'm Mikasa." She smiled at the two of them, "So you guys are here to spend your honey moon?" She wasn't one to ask personal questions since the first meeting, but the rings on their fingers were way too eye-catching to ignore.

"No—" Levi answered, but the sudden interruption by Petra cut him off.

"Not yet, but our wedding is soon, I made him wear an engagement ring so people will know he's taken, we're just here for work."  _Overly attached fiancée?_  That was what Mikasa thought anyway after hearing Petra's words, whom left no space for Levi to talk.

"Oh! I see so you guys work with each other?" Mikasa doubted she was doing well at pretending to be interested while talking.

"Yeah!" Petra nodded with a wide smile, her fingers trailing her fiancé's hand.

"That's sweet, it's like you're never separated from one another…wouldn't that get you to feel bored of each other though, if you're together all the time?"  _Oh, crap, that was rude to say, wasn't it?_ Mikasa thought, she could almost see Petra's blood boiling.

"Excuse me?" Petra sent a warning to the girl she had just met for saying such a thing.

"No offense, the girl is always loyal to the person she loves, even if she'd ever get bored of them." Mikasa knew she was now in Petra's hate list, but at least she could still try fix things, no? "But the problem is always with the guys, once they're bored of a girl, they get a replacement." No, that statement probably made it even worse.

"It's not like this at all for me and Levi, and then our wedding is soon and I don't think he would dare to leave me now, right, honey?" Petra looked up at her fiancé and held his hand in hers, intertwining their fingers together. Typical, every girl does that when trying to prove how strong her relationship with her lover is.

"Why are we even discussing such things?" Levi seemed not to give the conversation the slightest heed.

"Well, don't ask me." She gazed away from him.

"I'm sorry," Mikasa would usually die instead of apologizing, but she thought it was quite a necessity now, since it was basically her 'fault'? "I'm the one who brought this up, it's okay, let's talk about something else?"

It was a matter of time till the air became easy on all three, having an enjoyable dinner together, though all the talk was for the girls, Levi had enough listening only, he'd say a word or two if necessary though. They had wished each other a good night when the dinner ended, only to meet later in the elevator, coincidence had them staying at the same floor apparently.

"Have you ever come here before?" Out of curiosity, and boredom, Mikasa asked.

"No…" Levi shook his head, this place was all new to him.

"I did, it's really fancy, honey, you'll lose it once you see our suite." Petra said, tugging on Levi's cravat.

"When did you come here?" The surprise on Levi's face was rather hard to hide, the fact that his fiancée came here before was as new as this hotel was to him.

"Like a year ago, I had some work to do." Petra's hands kept playing with his cravat while she spoke, not minding him being slightly annoyed to know about this quite late.

"On your own?" Jealousy wasn't a familiar feeling Levi would usually have, not even now could he consider this jealousy because it wasn't.

"No, my partner came with me." Petra noticed the slight change in Levi's tone, and she could see the irritation clearly when looking him straight in the eyes.

"And—" Questions began outflowing his mind, but he contained himself and let the silence take place for now.

"And what?" Petra wasn't amused by the way he was talking to her.

"Nothing, we'll continue later." Though he was the one to be avoiding discussing such subjects on the dinner's table, he was now the one doing it.

Mikasa found it funny, and no matter how many times she tried to contain her laughter, she still failed and let a smirk escape her.

"What's so funny?" Annoyed, Petra questioned.

"Nothing, I just remembered something." It was an obvious lie, there was nothing else to laugh about except for the lack of trust between two people who are about to get married, Mikasa was lucky enough not to be questioned anymore when the door opened shortly, and they simply walked out and headed to their suites.

"Where are you staying at?" At the moment Petra asked, Mikasa was already standing at her suite's door.

"Right here…what about you?" Mikasa asked the girl in return.

"Oh! Our suite is in the opposite corridor to yours. We're neighbors." Petra chuckled, successfully hiding the fact that she was annoyed by that.

"That sounds nice, alright now, have a good night." Sure, Mikasa felt the dark aura starting to expand, and she excused herself to leave.

"Good night." Petra said and turned around to join Levi who was already walking ahead, and he had to stop at the door waiting for Petra to open it since she had the key, then they both walked into it.

"You used one room?" Before the door was even shut, Levi asked.

"What?" The question wasn't clear enough for Petra, and she eyed him from the distance.

"You and your partner,…when you came here last year." Levi was still curious about the details of Petra's latest visit to the hotel without his knowledge.

"Oh! Levi." Petra was debating about either laughing or glaring at him.

"Answer me…." His voice was sharp and serious.

"Of course not, why would we even use one room? And even if we did, I don't think you would have minded because that was before we get together." Pinching his cheek and giggling, she added, "Now, now, tell me: what do you think? Amazing isn't it?"

"I can't say otherwise…." Getting rid of the unnecessary doubts he had, Levi was now amazed by the splendor of the suite. "It's warm here, as if it's not winter time…"

"True." Petra tossed her bag to the table on her right and removed her jacket, the delightful view behind the window reflecting in her eyes. "It's snowing…slowly…and that makes me feel sleepy."

"How about we unpack the bags first, and then go sleep?" Levi had a thing for cleanliness and keeping things arranged, not even exhaustion would stop him.

"But I'm so tired right now and impatient to lie in that comfy bed…with you, I promise to unpack the bags and arrange our stuff tomorrow morning once I wake up, okay?" Petra's hands tugged on Levi's collar, pulling him down for a light kiss.

"Fine, I'm tired too anyway…" His arms winded around her waist, lips joined hers for another kiss, he could make some waivers for his fiancée's sake in the end.

"Let us go sleep now and next morning, we'll take care of the bags." Her words came out in soft whispers against the other's lips, fingers tracing up his neck.

"Sure, so concerning the bed you're dying to use, I would like to test how sturdy it is." With a wide smirk across his face, and a stormy blush on hers, Levi caged her in his arms, leading the way to the bedroom.

* * *

The hour hand was hitting midnight by the time sleep swung their souls, and their bodies fell dead beneath the sheets, the bliss Petra would come down from when their bodies finally separate promised her with peaceful dreams and calm nights, when Levi was the one to be thrown in the ocean of nightmares, where his sight get all blurry, fuzzy, his sweaty hands slipping from the wheel of his car, and no matter how far he was picking the speed, he still was incapable of reaching his goal, receiving a drastic hit from a truck his eyes missed seeing, and the world would go round and round till his eyes finally crack open.

"Screw these fucking nightmares…" Panting, sweating, cursing, his dreams betrayed him every night, always driving him back to the exact same nightmare.

"Levi…" His heavy breaths awakened Petra by his side, "are you okay?"

"Yeah," When all he could feel was the wetness all over his face and hair, his fingers ran through his bangs, wiping the sweat off his forehead in the process.

"Had another nightmare?" when her hands failed to find his cheek in the darkness, she sat up, "Just relax, you're still under the influence of the accident." Her lips did a better job and found his cheek for a warm kiss, "Get back to sleep."

"I can't." Sleep wasn't the way for his rest anymore, and he pushed the sheets off, looking for his pants and shirt on the ground to put them on and leave.

"Where to? Should I come with you?" But before she could even leave the bed, he stopped her.

"No, it's okay honey, I'll just go sit in the lobby for a bit," Buttoning his shirt, he said, pausing at the door, "I might come back late, and you need to sleep, you got work tomorrow."

"Alright, but you have to promise me that you're not going to drink, we've already discussed that." Old habits die hard, though his addiction to cleaning bothered her less, drinking wasn't a laughing matter, because it would only reflect badly on him.

"I won't drink, I promise, I'll just have a walk around." Drinking never helped him anyway, and he realized that at last.

He was standing in the lobby within couple of minutes, it was large and his eyes got lost looking around it, but they seemed to find a safe land when they caught Mikasa, on one of the couches there, her eyes closed.

 _What is she doing here?_  What a funny coincidence to find her here as well at this hour, his legs lead him unconsciously to her, until he was standing before her.

"Are you asleep?" Levi found it strange to sleep in here when she had a whole suite up there, "Miss Mikasa?" He called her name when he didn't get an answer.

"Mhm…what?" Her eyes raised lazily to glance up at him, he was still recognizable to her. "You…what do you want?"

"Are you sleeping in the lobby? I thought you were in your suite…" Not that he cared anyway.

"I was…then I felt lonely so I came here…and…I fell asleep…I guess." Struggling to push herself up, she fell back on the couch, helpless "Fuck."

"Are you okay?" Levi leaned down to her, and when his nostrils caught the smell of wine, he could now understand how she had fallen asleep in the lobby.

"Yeah, I…maybe I drank a little bit…too much, fuck…why is everything going round and…?" Her head felt as heavy as her eyes, they hurt.

"Should I get you a cup of tea?" He offered, but she shook her head.

"No…I just…wanna go back to my suite…can you walk me to it?" She wouldn't want to fall asleep in the elevator.

"Alright, give me your hand…I'll take you back to your suite" Levi decided to act like a real gentleman for once and help her, Petra wasn't there anyway and he wouldn't have her jealous, though when they were taking the elevator, Levi felt Mikasa's hand wrapping around his, and her head resting on his shoulder, he wasn't to blame her, she was asleep. "What a girl…" He shook his head at her naivety.

"…I hate you…" Her voice was barely audible, "I lost it…because of you…I never wanted to lose it," Levi had to lean closer to listen, "asshole…"

He could swear she was calling him asshole, but once he saw the tears glistening in her eyes, he knew she wasn't, and despite the fact that all he knew about her was her name, he still felt concerned,  _what is she even saying?_

The door soon opened, and with few more steps they arrived at her suite.

"Okay, miss Mikasa, we're here…" Levi hoped she could hear him and wake up.

"Why are you even calling me miss?…just call me by my name." Pushing away from him, her back pressed to the wall, handing him the key, "You open it." Her legs failed to carry her any longer, and she sat down on the ground.

"Are you alright?" Levi met her hand halfway and took the key.

"I'm just tired,…can you open the door now?" She blubbered, eyes closing.

Levi heaved a sigh and opened the door, "There, it's open…."

"Thanks…" She simply said but didn't move.

Levi gave her back the key and turned around, he walked to the elevator again since he hadn't had his walk yet, he pressed the button then looked her way, and she was still sitting on the ground, "Did she fall asleep again?" The door opened, and Levi found himself wondering whether he should simply leave her there or go back to her and walk her into her suite, "Well, shit." But there was no way he'd leave her there, what if someone would use her and it'd be his fault if that happened. With that thought in his mind, he walked back to her, and no matter how many times he had tried to wake her up she refused to, he had to carry her in his arms and walk in, at first he was simply going to put her on the sofa, but fuck, he had already entered the suite after all, so he took her to the bedroom and placed her down on the bed, covered her cold body with the sheets, then stood there, staring at her blankly, he couldn't tell for how long he had been staring, but he wouldn't stop if it wasn't for her phone to ring.

"Why the fuck am I still here?" And he left immediately, forgetting all about having a walk and just going back to his suite and joining his fiancée in the bed once again.

"You didn't take so long…" Petra was still awake, waiting for him to return.

"Yeah…" He tossed his shirt aside and got under the sheets.

"Had a quick walk?" She shifted closer, pulling him for a hug.

"Kinda…" He held her against him and caressed her cheek.

"Feel any better now?" She nuzzled her nose to his and asked.

"And sleepy too." That was something he hadn't felt for so long.

"You haven't slept properly since days, and you need to rest." Petra pressed her head to his chest, his heartbeats and the bouncing lulled her until she fell asleep again.

* * *

Morning light was leaking through the window, bothering Levi's sleepy eyes, while Petra was already dressed up for the meeting she had to attend, she had yet to kiss her fiancé goodbye though, she sat next to him, her fingers tracing his face and stroking his hair.

"Levi…I'm going now…" Her lips pressed to his cheek as she whispered and kissed him.

"What time is it?" he could barely part his lips to ask.

"Almost 10…" She answered and pulled back.

"Oh? And why didn't you wake me up?" His eyes then opened to gaze up at her, he had never slept for this long, he would always be the first to wake up.

"You're tired, and you need to rest." She hadn't seen him sleeping soundly in forever, and there was no way she would wake him up and ruin what little peaceful world he was diving in.

"So…I'm staying alone?" It would have been better if they were home, he could keep himself busy cleaning or cooking.

"Honey, don't get spoiled, you're not even supposed to be here with me, I asked you to come because I didn't want you to stay alone, and then you don't have work, you're enjoying your sick leave and once I'm free we'll have some time to go out." She smiled guiltily, wishing she could stay here with him instead.

"Alright, how long is the meeting?" Levi yawned and turned around to lie on his back, his elbow protecting his eyes from the daylight.

"Two hours maximum," She paused before adding, "but I might come back late, I will still have to check some documents with someone. But I promise to make it up for you."

"Oh, that's fine. I'll make sure to find another girl to amuse me until you're back." He said with a hint of tease in his tone.

"Oh! Is that so? Well, I don't mind…as long as things won't get dirty." She teased back and stood up. "Anyway, I have to go now, I unpacked the bags already and your clothes are in the closet, don't be late for having your breakfast and don't you even dare to drink while I'm not around, got it?"

"Anything else, mother?" Levi couldn't help a smile, for she was acting like his mothers.

"Take care, honey…I love you." She smiled widely then left.

"Take care you too." And once she left, Levi pulled the sheets over him again, back to sleep.

* * *

On the other hand, there was Mikasa, she was still unpacking her bags while speaking with Krista on phone.

"I called you like ten times and you didn't answer…" Ignorant to the details of last night's events, Krista was about to start investigating her friend for not answering her calls the entire night.

"I'm so sorry, I was having a walk around the hotel and forgot to take my phone with me, and when I got back to my suite it was late and I just jumped to the bed and fell asleep." Lying was the only way Mikasa found to provide activating Krista's rage mode.

"That's fine, as long as you haven't been drinking…" But she still suspected something anyway, "So, how's the hotel so far?"

"This place is awesome, you know what? I might change my mind and never come back." Mikasa smiled, already imagining Krista's reaction to what she had just told her.

"The fuck did you just say, darling?" Mikasa mimicked the movements of Krista's lips while saying so.

"I'm just kidding," She chuckled, "it's pretty warm inside here, it doesn't feel like winter at all…and if you could just see that bed I swear you'd never, ever, want to get up once you're lying on it."

There was a knock on the door, "Room service…" A woman spoke from the other side; she had brought the breakfast Mikasa ordered.

"Oh! That's the breakfast I ordered," Mikasa then walked to the door and opened it, and the servant walked in, dragging the table with her inside.

"Good morning, miss, here is the breakfast you ordered." The servant said.

"Thank you…" Mikasa was standing at the door, waiting for the servant to leave, till she heard some footsteps nearing and her eyes defined the sound to be Levi's, leaving his suite and walking her way, pausing in front of her.

"Good morning…" His words were calling for her to wake up from whatever daydream she was having.

"Oh! Hey!" Shuddering, she replied.

"Who's that?" Despite the unrecognizable voice, Krista still heard a man talking to Mikasa through the phone, shaking her curiosity.

"Uh! Krista, I'll call you back." Mikasa hung up while the servant walked out, there was only her and Levi then.

"How are you?" Silence was building a wall between them, and he had to break it.

"I'm…fine." Last night's events were flashing before her eyes as she spoke to him.

"So, feel better today?" Recalling how drunk she was, and the little journey back to her suite, he asked.

"Um…! Yeah…" she wanted to ask if he was okay too, but words would reach the edges of her lips successfully but end up failing to leave her mouth.

"That's good…" Clueless on what else to say, Levi was ready to leave.

"So, where's your fiancée? Not awake yet?" But Mikasa finally said something, even though she wasn't sure whether it was a good question to ask, and it sounded even worse once the words left her mouth.

"Actually she left, she has a meeting." He answered, his hands in his pockets.

"Oh? Don't you work with her?"  _Don't make it sound like an investigation._ She told herself.

"Not currently, I have a sick leave…"

"You don't look sick though…" Unless his height had something to do with it,  _wait, what?_

"I had a car accident few months ago…and it's sorta a long story." Levi wasn't certain whether she was interested in hearing a stranger's story, so he paused.

"You wouldn't mind telling me, would you?" Boredom and loneliness gathered to push her to a stranger, and perhaps he wasn't a stranger anymore?

"No, of course not…" For the same reasons Mikasa had, Levi didn't mind either.

"Okay, wait…" Her key was inside and she had to get it with her, it took her few minutes before she was back, closing the door behind her. "Let's go have our breakfast at the restaurant."

"Didn't you just order breakfast to your room?" Despite the door being closed, his eyes still memorized the exact place where the table of her breakfast was settled.

"It doesn't matter, I'm gonna pay for it anyway." She initiated the walk to the elevator, and he followed her. They were sitting in the restaurant moments later, having their breakfast ordered, they sat chatting.

"So, tell me the story…how did the accident happen?" She intertwined the fingers of her right hand with her left and rested her chin on them, her eyes on his.

"I can't remember what happened exactly," Levi seemed to take a deep moment of thinking before starting to tell, "I guess I was drunk…driving my car so fast, going somewhere…to get something I forgot…and then…there was this truck which showed up out of nowhere and suddenly hit my car and…that was all I could remember, I woke up in the hospital after four months…I was in a coma, then I stayed there for a couple of months and Petra has always been there for me…she'd visit me everyday…I'm so grateful to her."

"When did you propose to her?" Aware of the possibility that he still hadn't gotten over the accident, she decided to change the subject.

"Two weeks ago…" His answer surprised Mikasa.

"And when are you guys getting married?" According to what his fiancée said, their wedding was soon.

"Next summer…" That was even more surprising.

"Why did she keep saying your wedding was soon?" Mikasa huffed and crossed her arms.

"She just says that to every girl that tries to talk to me…so they wouldn't think about getting any closer." Levi smirked and shook his head.

"You mean that she'd get mad if she saw me with you?" It wasn't that she cared anyway, but he should care, and he shouldn't have accepted her invitation for breakfast if that was the case, even if his fiancée wasn't there to see him.

"No…you already know I'm engaged anyway." Of course he knew she'd get mad, but she had said  _'As long as things won't get dirty.'_  Having breakfast wasn't an improper thing to do so far.

"Did you…get together because…you love each other?" It wasn't curiosity that had her asking such a question, because her tone was different.

"…I guess so." Levi's answer wasn't convincing.

"I'm sorry…I'm just asking because I know a couple who are deeply in love with each other, that you can see the love in their eyes…but I can't see that in you and Petra." In comparison to her friends, Armin and Annie, she couldn't relate to Levi and Petra at all.

"What?…" Confused, Levi asked.

"Last night…when we were taking the elevator…" Mikasa recalled last night's events.

* * *

_"Have you ever come here before?" Out of curiosity, and boredom, Mikasa asked._

_"No…" Levi shook his head, this place was all new to him._

_"I did, it's really fancy, honey, you'll lose it once you see our suite." Petra said, tugging on Levi's cravat._

_"When did you come here?" The surprise on Levi's face was rather hard to hide, the fact that his fiancée came here before to was as new as this hotel was to him._

_"Like a year ago, I had some work to do." Petra's hands kept playing with his cravat while she spoke, not minding him being slightly annoyed to know about this quite late._

_"On your own?" Jealousy wasn't a familiar feeling Levi would usually have, not even now could he consider this jealousy because it wasn't._

_"No, my partner came with me." Petra noticed the slight change in Levi's tone, and she could see the irritation clearly when looking him straight in the eyes._

_"And—" Questions began outflowing his mind, but he contained himself and let the silence take place for now._

_"And what?" Petra wasn't amused by the way he was talking to her._

_"Nothing, we'll continue later." Though he was the one to b e avoiding discussing such subjects on the dinner's table, he was now the one doing it._

_Mikasa found it funny, and no matter how many times she tried to contain her laughter, she still failed and let a smirk escape her._

_"What's so funny?" Annoyed, Petra questioned._

_"Nothing, I just remembered something." It was an obvious lie, there was nothing else to laugh about except for the lack of trust between two people who are about to get married._

* * *

"You know what made me laugh? The fact that you were asking her if she came alone to the hotel…and I'm guessing the question you didn't want to ask her in front of me, was whether she stayed in one room with her partner…" Mikasa tilted her head to the side and stared into Levi's eyes. "Because if you really loved her, you'd trust her…and you wouldn't ask her that."

"Are you a psychiatrist?" Levi was speechless for few seconds before he could finally ask.

"No, I just learnt few lessons from my own experience." She answered truthfully.

"…Your experience?" He got curious.

"…My experience in love, which I don't wanna talk about." A paiful experience, she could never erase from her memories no matter how hard she tried.

"…Why not? I just told you my story." He had just answered her questions, but she refused to answer his.

"Okay, I'll tell you my story once you answer my question." Her personal life wasn't something she would share with a stranger that easily.

"What question?"

"Are you going to marry her because you love her?" There was a smirk on her face for a second.

"What's the point of knowing my answer?" It wasn't like it would affect her after all.

"Personal reasons…" She claimed and gazed away from him. "Okay, let's have our breakfast now."

"Do you remember what happened last night?" He wanted to make sure she still remembered, because it didn't seem like it.

"What happened last night?" She She could still remember seeing him in the lobby and asking him to take her back to her suite, but she was oblivious on the rest, and whether the wine had her leaking some personal information about her.

"Were you drinking? Because I found you asleep on the couch in the lobby, unable to stand, then you asked me to walk you to your suite and when I did, you sat on the ground and slept there." He summarized what happened; it didn't deserve much details anyway.

"But I woke up in my bed today…" And she realized how she was clueless on how she got there, it only made her concerned, almost choking on her food.

"Yeah, thank me…" Levi snickered softly.

"Okay, just so you know, I only drink when I'm stressed…like really, really! stressed." She exclaimed, he hadn't mentioned anything important, it calmed her doubts a tad bit.

"You were fine when we met in the restaurant, what made you stressed?" It was now his turn to ask questions.

"That's personal too." Even though Levi never minded answering her questions no matter how personal they were, Mikasa still refused to tell him anything.

"Did you lose someone lately?" Recalling what she had said in her sleep while taking the elevator, Levi asked, and Mikasa's eyes lifted to gaze up at him, "You were saying something about…losing something you didn't want to lose because of somebody…"

"No!" She gulped and glared, "Look, Levi, I was drunk and I said some nonsense things, just drop it and don't ask me about it again." She slammed the fork on the table and stood up. "Now if you'd excuse me, I need to finish unpacking my stuff." She said before turning around and leaving the restaurant, she had no idea how far had she went telling him about her past, but it scared her to the fullest, and she wasn't going to stay and hear more.

 _What a girl!_  Levi thought to himself and watched her as she left.

* * *

_Don't fucking cry!_

She had repeated those words nonstop in her head all the way to her suite, everything hurt, her feet, her eyes, her  _heart_ , she broke down once shutting herself inside the suite, falling to her knees, tears tracing down her cheeks, her hands felt stoned, but she struggled and lifted them up to wipe those tears off, silencing herself.

She was a time bomb, but it wasn't time yet to explode,  _not yet._

There was a ringing, it was a message she had just received on her phone, so she forced herself up and walked back to the bedroom, reaching her hand to the nightstand and taking her phone, it was a message from Annie that said: "Your mother got your number, call me once you get this." She had five missed calls from her too, and stupid Mikasa forgot her phone again, but she called her back anyway.

"Mikasa…" Annie answered, "Good morning, I called you so many times but you didn't answer."

"Yeah…I forgot the phone in the room," She sat down on the bed, "anyway, what is it? What about mom?"

"Apparently she had been calling your old number and when she found it was out of service she came to your apartment, Armin and I met her halfway then she started asking about you and asked me for your new number…and I gave it to her…" She said with a hint of guilt in her tone.

"So, she didn't ask about me all six months long and now she suddenly remembered me?" Mikasa said; it was rather suspicious.

"Not exactly—" Annie bit on her lower lip and said, "She's been actually asking about you constantly…sometimes she'd meet me or Krista and ask us about you, she told us not to let you know…and I just did, but now since she obviously wants to talk to you personally, I thought I should tell you…so you wouldn't be shocked if she ever called." Annie explained everything to Mikasa.

"I see…" There was nothing more she could say; she couldn't even know whether to feel happy that her mother was thinking about her or get mad at her for it, "Thanks for telling me."

"So, how are you? Did you like the place?" Annie tried to change the subject, knowing how sensitive Mikasa is when it had something to do with her mother.

"Yes, it's pretty nice." But Mikasa's voice said it all, she was upset.

"…Forget about your concerns, Mikasa, and live your life,…use the chance of being away from people to think things over, you can control everything if you wanted to," Annie said in a cheering tone, "And then the world's full of handsome guys whom actually deserve you, believe it…you have to."

"Thanks, Annie…I will." Annie's words brought a small smile to Mikasa's lips, but not for so long.

"Alright…I'll talk to you later." Knowing that she would probably need some time alone, Annie wanted to end the call.

"Tell the others I said hi…" Mikasa said before the call ended and sighed to herself, she sat there lost in thoughts for a couple of minutes before getting up to finish unpacking her stuff, and to amuse herself, she turned on the TV.

"Christmas is around the corner, ladies and gentlemen," A journalist spoke, "we can even see the happiness outflowing everywhere, everyone is getting prepared for it, there is nothing compared to gathering with our families, friends, and lovers around the fire, recalling the wonderful memories we lived throughout the year and telling stories, I personally am going to spend this Christmas with my parents, I haven't seen them since a long time but Christmas night will make it up for sure," Mikasa sighed softly at the mention of 'parents', "Let us ask some citizens about their plans for Christmas this year…" The journalist walked towards a girl that was walking by and stopped her, "Good morning miss."

"Good morning…" The girl smiled at the camera.

"Can you introduce yourself for us, please?" The journalist asked kindly.

"Sure, my name is Sasha, I'm 23…" The girl grinned.

"Sasha, can you tell us how do you love spending Christmas night, with friends, or family? What do you do?"

"I usually spend it with my family, but this time I'm going to spend it with Connie; my fiancé." There was a light blush on Sasha's cheeks as she said that.

And Mikasa then looked up at the screen with wide eyes.

"He promised to take me to a beautiful place so we can spend it together and I'm so excited, I guess any girl would be excited to spend that night with her lover, hehe!" Sasha giggled softly.

"Good luck with him, Sasha…and hope you won't go through the same as me." Mikasa mumbled then turned off the Tv, everything around her was only reminding her with how stupid and naive she had been, reminding her with things she hated to remember, now only focusing on getting her stuff arranged, instead. She finished within an hour and got changed, wearing a coat and holding her bag in her hand, she then left the hotel for a walk.

The valet met her halfway at the hotel's entrance. "Miss, would you like me to get your car for you?"

"No, thanks, I'll go on a walk" Mikasa nodded at the valet then began walking in slow steps, her eyes wandering around, few kids playing here, some elders talking there, a family having fun together, everyone had something special to do at this time of the year, but all that caught Mikasa's gaze, was a little boy crying, at first she was going to simply ignore him and keep walking, but she couldn't help but stop and kneel down to him.

"Hey there, little buddy. Why are you crying?" She placed a hand over his head and patted him gently, but the kid kept crying, "Did someone hurt you, shouldn't you be playing with your friends?" She insisted to know.

"I d-don't…h-have toys." He cried out.

"Someone stole them from you?" She frowned.

"No, m-mommy and daddy…say that…toys are a waste of time a-and that they're too expensive and they can't buy them for me." He sobbed, "All my friends' parents bought them toys except for mine!"

"Aw! There's no need to cry darling, would you like me to buy you some?" Perhaps she had made a sin before, which had her going through all that pain for so long, and bringing a kid to smile was something she had always wanted to do, it would make her happy, so happy. The boy's eyes widened at her, "Would you like to come with me? We'll go to a close toys store and I'll buy you anything you like."

"For real?" The boy gasped in happiness, Mikasa nodded, "Yay! I'm in."

"I'm in too." Mikasa could swear she heard Levi.

"Levi!" It was him, indeed. "What are you doing here?"

"Well," He put his hands in his pockets, "I felt lonely after you left me and decided to go out for a walk…then I found you here with this kid and wanted to join you, you guys don't mind, right?"

"What about your fiancée?" Mikasa asked teasingly, "What would she say if she didn't find you in the hotel?"

"Let her wait, like I waited for her." Levi then leaned down and carried the kid on his shoulders, "Come on, let's go."

Mikasa smiled then nodded her head in agreement and walked ahead with the two.

"So, what's your name?" Levi asked, looking up at the kid.

"Alex!" He answered, tugging on Levi's shoulders.

"So, Alex, would you like to play a game?" Levi wasn't the kind to usually communicate with children, but he sure had his own way to do it.

"What is it?" The kid asked excitedly.

"How about we play the role of a family…This miss right here with us, and I are going to be your parents, and you're our little child, and we're all going to buy you some toys." Mikasa almost choked at Levi's words.

"Yes! I love this game!" Alex giggled innocently.

"And you?" Levi then looked at Mikasa, asking about her opinion.

"Um…" She stared into his eyes for a brief second before nodding, "That's a good idea, darling."

"Great, we're a family now." Levi held his hand out to her and said.

"…A family of strangers." She added before wrapping her arm around his and let the game begin.

And so they walked together all the way until they finally ended up in a toys' store, they walked in and Levi headed to one of the shelves to see some toys Alex might like, while Mikasa froze in her place, her eyes glistened with tenderness seeing Levi and Alex, she was unaware that she had been smiling at their sight, but the smile soon faded away, the tenderness that once filled her eyes was now nothing but pain and tears.

"Honey, come help us choose some toys." Levi called for her and she instantly wiped away her tears before he would notice and walked to him, but he still noticed. "Were you crying?"

"No…it's just cause of the cold, my eyes get teary." She lied.

"…You sure?" It was quite an obvious lie for him to believe.

"Yes."

"Mommy, which toy do you think I should buy?" Alex soon broke the awkward silence and asked.

Once they chose the toys to buy together, it was time for them to pay, and Mikasa was about to take out her wallet, but Levi stopped her.

"Hey, wait a minute, we're family, remember? I'm the father, paying is my responsibility." Levi's words got her and she stood there looking at him blankly. "Here sir…" And so Mikasa decided to put her wallet back and let Levi pay, they were family after all, and even though it was a fake family, she still loved it.

"Thank you for visiting my store." The store's owner said.

"No problem." Levi nodded and took the bag in his hand to hand it to Alex, but when they turned around to leave, the old man stopped them.

"Oh, wait a second…" He called out for them.

"Yes?" Levi paused and looked back at the man.

"I'm giving free Christmas necklaces for the families who visit my stores, give me a moment I'll get them." The man walked to one of the shelves where he was placing those necklaces.

"Oh, sir, actually we're n—" She was going to tell him, they weren't actually a family, but Levi had to interrupt her.

"Thank you so much, sir, we're always going to remember your store." There was no way he'd let her ruin the game when it just started to get better.

Even though Mikasa wanted to punch him so much because it felt more like a crime, but she still was having fun, the man gave them the necklaces and they wore them.

"I call them the wings of freedom," The necklaces represented wings, and they looked simply perfect on them. "Merry early Christmas, and happy new year." Returning his wishes, they left.

"Now, shall we take you back to your home?" Mikasa asked Alex.

"What's so rush? Is this all the families do? Just buy toys? Don't they have lunch together too?" Levi seemed to be enjoying the game so far to end it now.

"…Lunch? You're taking it way too far." Not that she didn't like it, but then again, the kid had parents whom must be so worried about him now.

"Why not? This is how it'll get even more exciting." Levi had no problem with taking things even further.

"Who said I'm not in, alright then my babies, let's go to a deluxe restaurant and have our lunch."  _Perhaps it'll be fun after all_ , Mikasa thought.

"What should we do after having lunch?" Levi asked, starting to walk.

"Let's build a snowman!" Alex suggested.

"That's actually a good idea." Mikasa couldn't help but adore the smile on Alex's face, she would never say no to him.

It was a matter of minutes before they found a good restaurant and reserved a table.

"So, darling, what should we order?" Checking the menu in his hands, Levi asked Mikasa.

"Let us ask our son, Alex, what do you wanna eat?" She then gazed down at the kid.

"Grilled fish!" He answered excitedly.

"Alright, grilled fish and a salad…" Levi nodded, ready to order.

Once their order was ready, they began eating, but Alex was having a problem with removing the fish bones, and Levi kept staring at him, he was about to offer his help but Mikasa beat him to it.

"Wait, dear, let me help you with this." She brought his plate close to her and began removing the spines for him.

"Thanks mom." Alex watched her carefully, and so did Levi.

"You love children, don't you?" He has noticed, and decided to ask at last.

"A lot," She gazed up at him, "…I love their innocence,…the kid's come to this world in hope for having a life just like they dream to, they don't carry a grudge in their hearts, and they don't know about what's surrounding them of cruel realities…I wish I could go back to that…when I still had that innocence…and before I find out about the painful truths that changed my life…." Mikasa failed to hide the pain in her eyes, and Levi could see through them.

"It tastes great, thanks mom." Alex's voice soon brought Mikasa back to the present time, she smiled and ruffled the boy's hair.

"It is probably too late to wish such a thing, but as long as we're alive, we still have a chance to see that innocence through the kids' eyes," Levi suddenly said, drawing a surprised expression on Mikasa's features. "We can have kids and watch their faces all the time to see it, and whenever they grow up, we can always have more kids if we miss seeing that innocence…"

"I have an idea!" Alex shouted, "Dad, why don't you marry mom and have kids with her?" He spoke in an even louder tone.

"Oi, brat, lower your tone…" Levi warned the kid, but it was too late, everyone was staring at them.

"People around us will get it wrong if they hear you saying that…" Mikasa smiled nervously down at the boy.

"Dad should marry mom, dad should marry mom, dad should marry mom!…" But Alex wanted to be a naughty kid and began shouting.

"Alright, fine I'll marry her, now shut up." Levi said in a hope for the kid to stop yelling.

"Yay! Mom and dad are getting married." Alex grinned happily.

"Oi! I said shut up—"

"Eh, in ancient times, the kids would come after the marriage, but nowadays they come earlier by years, what a foolish generation." An old woman mumbled to her husband as they passed by the table.

"Oh. Dear god." Mikasa's cheeks burned red, she couldn't find a place to hide or else she would have already done that. "Everyone is staring at us, I think I'm going to faint."

"No, no, honey, or else they're gonna think our second child is on the way." Levi said mockingly.

"I'm going to have a brother, yay!" There he goes, Alex shouting again.

"I'm sorry, sir, could you please make your son keep silent, it's going to cause problems for our restaurant, and rumors…" The waiter spoke as politely as he could.

"Uh! It's not what it looks like…you see we're not married." Levi tried to explain.

"Yes, I guess everyone knows that already." The waiter replied sarcastically.

"Also this isn't our child, we don't even know each other…" Mikasa tried to clarify things as well.

"Oh, yes, sure I do believe you, you're just a bunch of strangers who wanted to have lunch together." The waiter looked at the three of them poker-faced.

"…Even though it sounds weird…but yes." Levi then realized that didn't make things sound any better, but at least the waiter walked off. "Hurry up and finish your plate, we have to leave." Levi glared down at the kid.

"I never felt embarrassed as much as I did today." Mikasa let out a sigh once they finally left the restaurant.

"Why should we care about what people think? We know what's going on for real, we just wanted to help a kid to spend some good time before Christmas." Levi assured her, and he was right, there was no need to worry about other people. "Now, let's go to our last destination." Levi walked a bit faster with Alex, until he realized Mikasa was only following them from behind, so he paused and looked at her. "Mikasa, where's your hand? I want you to hold my hand like you did earlier."

"Oh…" She hesitated for a moment, but remembered that these moments wouldn't last forever, she needed to have some fun too, right? So she walked towards them and held his hand, "There."

"Perfect…" Their eyes met for a couple of silent seconds, "Let's go."

After few minutes, they arrived at a park that was all covered in snow, and it was the perfect place for them to build a snow man, a  _big_  one.

"Alright, we should get to work." Levi leaned down and put Alex on the ground.

"I feel like a child…" Mikasa chuckled while looking around the place.

"Well, you did say you wanted to be a child again, didn't you?" He invited her to be a child now.

"I know, and this is amazing."

All three enjoyed their time in each other's company, like  _a real family_ , for once, Levi and Mikasa were kids again, and their concerns were all forgotten with every snow ball they made, and when they thought they didn't know what having fun was, they realized how much they enjoyed and cherished every second, their efforts had them building a big snowman which they sat in front of to watch proudly.

"What do you think?" Mikasa asked Alex.

"Amazing!" Impressed, Alex said.

" it looks like your dad, doesn't he?" She glimpsed at Levi's face while saying so.

"Oh?" Levi then tossed some snow at Mikasa's face, "Nah, I think it looks more like you." He said mockingly.

"No," She avenged her face and tossed some snow at his, only declaring a war between the two of them, throwing snow balls at each other.

"Stop!" She demanded, and yet she was still making a snow ball to throw at him.

"Ladies first…"

"Fine…" She paused, and so did he. "I stopped."

"So did I."

"Good."

"Good." Levi could swear he saw her smirking, but he soon understood why when she tossed more snow at his face, wiping it all over it with her palm. "Fuck, this is cold…." His hands gripped her wrist and pulled it away from his face.

"You deserve it." She was ready to throw another snow ball at him she was holding in her other hand, but Levi reacted quickly and griped her other hand too, Mikasa struggled to free her hands from his hold, but all she got was being pushed down to the ground with her hands pinned forcefully on each side of her head…and him, over her.

* * *

_There was silence then…and my eyes seemed too weak to avoid his gaze. He looked down at me with those sharp, blue eyes, and my heart skipped a beat. The heat in my body was burning…burning…For a second, I wished my clothes would burn with it, too, so I could feel the cold snow beneath me and cool down. I parted my lips to ask him to get off, but next thing I knew was his lips pressed forcefully to mine, and my eyes shut instantly…Why wouldn't my body move? Why wouldn't I push him away? Why am I letting an engaged man kiss me…It should stop…This was wrong, so wrong…but so unbelievably pleasing._

* * *

To Be Continued.


	2. Temptation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the second chapter. 
> 
> Check the fanart for the last scene from the first chapter on my tumblr: rivamika-ackerman  
> Hope you're going to enjoy this chapter just as much.

**Warnings:** Slightly NSFW, with a mention of abortion.

* * *

**_Part II: Temptation_ **

* * *

_The moment our lips touched, I was brought to a whole new world. The cold breeze slowly disappearing when his lips warmed mine up, sent temptation running along my spine, and I wanted to wrap my arms around his neck. I wanted to pull him closer against me. I wanted him. I wanted this to last as long as it could, but I only froze there paralyzed, unable to move a bone. I stopped sensing any of my surroundings for a while, before his lips parted from mine. I didn't want to open my eyes. Although I didn't initiate this, it would feel so awkward to look him in the eyes._

"Alex, what the hell do you think you're doing?"

_His words forced me to peek from between my half opened eyelids, and I saw Alex riding Levi's back. Soon, the image was all clear to me: Alex must have pushed him down towards me when jumping over his back, which led into an accidental kiss. Oh! So silly me! It shouldn't have been that much of a surprise after all. He was engaged, but I could swear it took him quite long to pull away from me, as if half of it wasn't an accident, indeed._

* * *

Her breaths were racing her heartbeats as the man eased his weight off of her, and she straightened up to sit, tugging at the crimson fabric around her neck with a shaking hand, reclaiming the breaths she had lost in the incandescence of the kiss. It felt so real, it blurred her from observing the bigger image. Her foolishness felt like a burden she couldn't heave off her chest, but thankfully, she refrained from returning the kiss, scarcely avoided an embarrassing condition. His eyes would have been the last thing she'd get the courage to stare into, then.

"I hope you're not hurt." Levi's tone didn't hold any kind of fluster. He was offering his hand to the girl in an obliging manner to help her get on her feet, as if their lips hadn't parted just a moment ago. Instead of apologizing for accidentally kissing her –which was supposedly a big deal considering being engaged to another woman-, his question only roamed around falling on top of her with no further concerns.

"No…" Her eyes caught his glimpsing at her lips, and she thought he was about to make a comment about what just happened, but he didn't. Taking his hand after having waiting for a lacking remark, Mikasa got on her feet, brushing the snow off her clothes and hair. "Alex, come on. Let's take you home now." Reconsidering things in her head, Mikasa ended up concluding a possible overreaction on her part. It was an accidental kiss,  _accidental_ , not a big deal—wasn't it?

"Okay mommy!" Keeping a sweet tone while calling her 'mommy', Alex rushed towards the woman, taking her big hand in his small grasp, "Daddy, come on…" Joining his other hand with Levi's, the three of them finally began their walk back, ending today's little adventure with a bonus of having a good souvenir before Christmas. As they arrived at Alex's home, it was time for them to say goodbye to the boy which offered them a free drive to their lost innocence. They paused at the front entrance, waving their hands at the kid before walking to his home.

"Thanks a lot. I had so much fun today. This is the best day of my life!" The boy wore a bright grin while expressing his thankfulness to the older ones. There was a proud smile across Mikasa's cheeks, for she accomplished her mission successfully, which included taking a sad boy from his home and wiping off his tears, to bring him back later on after having replacing his sad features with happier ones. Being happy suited him better, for sure.

"We enjoyed this just as much." She brought her height to his and bent down to him, giving his hair a final ruffle, "Just make sure not to break your toys, alright? Keep them safe, so you can always remember us." She said hopingly, knowing how life would always bring people to forget throughout the years.

"I promise!" He giggled, "I'll see you later…!" He waved at them, unaware of this being probably the last time he would see them, then turned around and ran back to his home, to his  _real_  family.

"What an adorable kid!" The words were hard to push out of her throat and came out in a wistful voice. Her eyes followed his each step until the door closed, forbidding her from witnessing and admiring the happiness she never felt or known, but was sure if happiness had a figure, Alex would be it.

"Yeah!" Curiously -but not so remarkably- Levi's eyes examined her features. She was sad, he assumed. "Let's head back, too." And once the words left his mouth, the clouds got rid of their pressure, spraying the grounds with rain. "Oh! Shit…"

"Damn, I forgot to bring my umbrella…" It was in her hold for a second, before she took her leave, but having changed her mind, she didn't bring it with her. "I guess it's okay if we get wet…" Her eyes were esteeming the fall of the rain, when they fell back on her own hand after feeling a tight grab around it. It was Levi, seizing her hand and dragging her with him in a hurry, stealing her from an awfully beautiful moment she would rather enjoy.

"When you get sick, you'll totally love getting wet under the rain." He warned. Her irises had a sparkle within as they reflected the tight grasp around her wrist, moving to observe his back and head. She would rather look at his face, though. She wasn't fully disliking his back sight, at least it was saving her from exposing the blush that painted her cheeks at the not-so-proper thought that played in her head, flashing that so called 'accidental kiss' before her, and urging her to tell him, ' _your kiss was hot enough to keep me from catching cold'_ Knowing she would sound dumb and childish telling him such a thing, she swallowed the words forcefully, having enough with simply watching him as he led the way.

* * *

"Look at your face…" She pointed out once they arrived back at the hotel. Their clothes were dripping, their hair too. Her hand was still in his, but as they walked longer, their fingers intertwhiskyd—not that they paid much attention to it, did they? "You look funny."

"You look even uglier now." He said with a grumpy expression. They got all wet by the time they finally arrived, and at one point as they walked, they gave up on rushing since their clothes were all drenched.

"Levi…" Petra's sudden call brought Levi's eyes to meet hers. She had been waiting for him to come back, and at the moment she saw him entering the lobby, unexpectedly with Mikasa, the woman stood up and headed to meet him, eyeing their intertwhiskyd fingers from the distance with a furrowed eyebrow.

"Ah! You're here." Despite noting the way his fiancée was observing him, Levi's hand was still holding Mikasa's. Though she pulled it away when noticing how Petra kept eyeing her.

"Looks like you had fun" Petra said with a forced smile, "…with Mikasa." She struggled to get the latter part out, snickering nonchalantly.

"Well, I did say I would find another girl to have fun with, didn't I?" Wearing a completely insouciant look, his voice showed neither concern nor heed, fingers brushing his hair.

"I do remember that. I also remember saying that I don't mind as long as things won't get dirty" Shooting a glare over at the brunette, she said in a huff, "…Look at you…you guys are all wet." Petra approached her fiancé then, her hand stroking his wet face.

"Excuse me now, I shall go change." Mikasa excused herself to leave. Petra's gazes were making her feel the uneasiness in her presence. There was no reason to stay, after all.

"You probably want to take a hot shower too. Drink something…you know, just in case." Before she'd leave, Levi said. She paused, sending a curious gaze over at him.

"Yeah…I'll do that." Giving him a nod, she turned again and walked away.

"I think you're a little bit  _too_ concerned about her…" Petra was unable to hide a frown from showing on her face once the other girl was away. She could also stop pretending and pulled away from him, her arms crossed in expression to her annoyance.

"Why does that matter? You're still my fiancée."

"Oh! You just remembered that?"

"Don't make such a huge-ass deal out of bullshit. Now, let's go to our suite. I need to get changed before I'd get sick." Levi wasn't up for an unnecessary argument, so he began walking to the elevator instantly.

"I hope you get sick." Mumbling in the depths of her throat, Petra followed her fiancé with piercing gazes from behind.

* * *

The moment her feet led her into her suite which seemed further than usual. Her back and arms were pressing against the wooden surface of the door as a support to keep her standing. Her hand slipped under the coat and rested on her chest, feeling her heartbeats over her slightly wet shirt, her heartbeats which were faster than normal.

The secret behind her fast heartbeats wasn't a mystery. It had always been the same reason ever since her lips pressed to Levi's. No. It wasn't love. Love was a strong word to express her feelings. Was it attraction? Perhaps, it was a strange kind of attraction, though. She was wondering what his reaction would be if she kissed him. Would the kiss last longer? Probably, because she believed he felt attracted to her just as much.

He was engaged. That thought only was enough to throw all her thoughts into the toilet and swill them to the sewers. Her excitement vanished, and she dropped her handbag on the table as she walked to the bathroom. A hot shower would be helpful to get her a clear mind after this weird, yet great day.

* * *

"Can you get me some clothes from the closet? I don't want to get everything wet. I'll be in the shower." Levi demanded from his angry future wife, his obsession with cleanliness always present. He wouldn't call it obsession, though. It was more of a necessity to him, at least. No matter where he was, even a dump would end up being a perfect place to live in at his disposal.

He was getting prepared to take a bath, too. Petra joined his in the bathroom after having removed her jacket and getting him some dry clothes from the closet. He was topless, and seeing his back muscles was enough to wipe away the angry look on her face. She wondered if he did it on purpose.

"Where did you get that from?" Her question was referring to the new material around his neck, a necklace she never saw him wearing before.

"Oh? This?" He held the necklace up with his finger, "We went to a toys' store and the shopkeeper gave us these."

"What were you doing in a toys' store?" She arched an eyebrow at him. As far as she knew, Levi wasn't the kind to get along with kids to even begin with.

"There was this kid with us, and the storekeeper thought we were family…then gave us these necklaces." He explained.

"Thought you were family?" Forget about not getting along with kids. The storekeeper thought Levi and Mikasa were a family? "But you told him you weren't family, right?" She hoped.

"No, because it was a sort of a game and it would have been ruined if we told him…"

 _A game? Since when does Levi play games?_  "Ah!...Well. Soon, it won't be just a game…After we get married, we'll have a lot of kids…and we can go to that shop again, so our kids will have necklaces, too." Even though she still wanted to go on with investigating him, she decided to pull a stop and pretend to be cool with whatever the hell he did out there with Mikasa. She was aware of Levi being a big tease. He was probably trying to tease her now. She wouldn't let him do it this time.

"The man would be dead by then…" Levi mocked, but Petra wasn't a fan of his jokes and she simply threw the clothes at him and turned to leave. Any more word from him and she'd explode. Before she'd leave, Levi's hand reached in a hurry to grab hers, pulling her for a quick kiss. "It was a joke, get it…"

"Levi, your jokes suck…They're not funny…" There was a pout on her face as she said that.

"So, I was thinking, how about we make things fair and get you wet as well…in the hottest way ever…" Levi's words came out in a teasing whisper tickling her ear, sending chills down her spine, and a flush across her cheeks.

"I think I do need a shower, after all, so I can relax…"

"Good. Let's get rid of your clothes first."

* * *

Mikasa was right. The shower did help her relax and clear her mind. And she was still lying in the bathtub, immersed in hot water, humming a song to herself, until the ringing of her phone broke into her peaceful world and ruined the moment for her. She reached her hand to it and checked the screen. There was no name, and she guessed it was her mother, but she declined the call and put her phone aside again, till it rang once more.

 _Fuck…she's not going to stop, is she?_  She mumbled, taking her phone again and answering the call, "Yes? Yeah. I know it's you. What do you want?... Who are you talking about?... What makes you think I care for fuck's sake?... Yeah. Whatever, I wish you meet in hell. Don't call me again to tell me things I don't give a damn about…" She raged and ended the call with the urge to almost breaking her phone again but she settled it down and dived herself into the tub, almost feeling the hot water boiling with her blood. It seemed hopeless to her, because no matter where she'd go, she could never run away from the past.

No one could run away from the past.

* * *

"I just ordered the food to our suite. It should be here shortly." The ginger haired declared, heading to the living room where her fiancé was sitting. Strangely, he was getting ready to leave apparently."We're going to have dinner together, where are you going?" Her eyebrows furrowed at the slightly taller man for she was hoping they could enjoy at least having a meal together, alone, which they didn't do ever since coming here.

"I'm not hungry…and I'm honestly feeling bored. I'll go for a walk outside." Levi approached his fiancée and pinched her nose, "Don't make that face." He frowned slightly at the look she was giving him.

"It's cold outside, you'll get sick…Don't you remember how you got all wet in the rain this morning?" The woman tugged at his jacket in a pleading manner, but he simply took her hand off his jacket and held it in his.

"No. I'll be fine…I would take you with me, but you said you were tired, so…you should head to sleep early." He gave her hair a light ruffle.

"I didn't ask to come anyway." She turned her back to him and walked back to the bedroom. "Just don't be late. I'll wait till you come so we can sleep together." She said firmly.

"Didn't have enough in the shower?" Levi teased, causing a hard blush on Petra's cheeks. He couldn't see it because she wouldn't turn to look at him, though. She simply walked off frustrated with clenched fists. Levi smirked from behind and walked to the door, leaving the suite and walking in the corridor. His eyes landed on the closed door of Mikasa's suite opposite to him, encountering an unstoppable flashback of their journey this morning; their accidental kiss more precisely. It wasn't quite accidental, though.

The accident limited to the part where Alex jumped on Levi's back and pushed him down. He didn't quite fall, though. He could have pushed himself up in time, but he let it all happen. Not quite sure why, he wasn't regretting it, either. It felt so nice. He could still taste her lips. The only thing that was a bother to him was how he distasted kissing Petra later on, or how he wasn't feeling into it while sharing that shower with her. He wasn't supposed to feel that way towards her. She was his fiancée. They were going to be getting married soon. She would be the woman he would spend his life with.

Levi guessed it was a matter of commitment. He should consider it a test, and no matter how much he'd get distracted, he should keep focusing on the real matter; that he was an engaged man now. He should stay loyal to the person he decided. He shouldn't waste a precious relationship just for the sake of a caprice.

He was in the lobby when a big plaque fixed to the wall caught his sight, dragging him out of his cloudy thoughts. It wasn't there this morning, and out of curiosity, he walked to it to read it. It was an announcement of a fete:

* * *

_In the honor of our hotel's fifth anniversary, the manager, Erwin Smith, has organized a fete that will take place on December 3rd, 9 pm; tomorrow night that is. The pleasure is ours if all the guests of our hotel would be kind and attend the fete._

_Drinks and dinner will be free for everyone, with a musical touch to set the mood for you. Your arrival will be appreciated._

_Thanks._

_The hotel staff._

* * *

As Levi finished reading the announcement, his eyes drifted swiftly to stare inside the restaurant, and surprisingly, he spot the subject of his fantasies, Mikasa, sitting by the counter, having a drink alone. He swirled his eyes in a moment of hesitation, before changing his plans for going out tonight and joining the young woman. "Good evening." He greeted, and she lifted her head to stare at the man and meet his eyes.

"Levi! Good evening." She greeted back, quite surprised by his presence. Not wanting to initiate a staring contest, her eyes lowered to her cup of whisky, and she took a sip from the drink.

"You're nervous?" He guessed, and she looked up at him again with a questioning look in her eyes, "You said you only drink when you're  _really_ nervous."

"You got it." She smirked at his remark and nodded in confirmation to his guess.

"Mind if I joined you?"

"Not at all!" Receiving her approval, he took a seat next to the woman. "I hope you didn't have a fight with your fiancée after she saw us this morning…" The glares Petra was shooting at Mikasa in the lobby earlier that day were utterly discomforting to her.

"No. She doesn't really make a big deal out of nothing." It was quite a surprise to him, having her dropping the subject once he suggested having a shower together -which he regretted right away- "Did you have dinner yet?"

"No. I'm not hungry, actually…" She snickered softly, her lips brushing the edges of her cup as she murmured the words in a dulcet tone before sipping the drink.

"That makes two of us." Levi said, lingering his stay and inviting himself for a cup of whisky for his own amusement.

"Do you have a cigarette?" She demanded, swallowing the last sip of her drink and putting the empty cup down on the counter.

"No. I don't smoke…and I don't think you're allowed to smoke in here." He alerted, pointing at a sign on the wall on her right that said  _No Smoking._  "You know…this is a family place, people might get bothered by the smoke."

"Well, fuck…" She grumbled in a fatigue tone, running her fingers through her hair and pushing her bangs back.

"What's wrong? You were fine this morning." Levi observed the tired look on her face with a hint of despair in the luster of her eyes. If he would tell someone this woman was all energetic and bright just this morning, they wouldn't believe him.

"I know…I  _was_  fine. Now, I'm not…It's funny how things change so quickly…" She frowned, ordering another cup.

"Well, changes are a part of life. You can't help it…just move on." Levi blew the words against his cup, bringing it closer to his lips and tasting the whiskyy drink.

"I moved on…but the past keeps chasing me…"

"You can't run away from the past." He'd tried multiple times yet couldn't, "No matter what the decisions you made back then were, the only thing you can do is to make sure you won't regret the choices you made."

Her eyes glinted with impression by his prudent words, curiously beholding him from the corner of her eye. Her eyebrow furrowing in inquisitiveness, "So, you're saying that you don't have any regrets?"

"No!…At least, not yet." Levi's lips curled in a cocky smirk at her question, the small chat they had on breakfast lurching in his head as her pending question reechoed in his ears, "About your question." He was urged to answer it, "…If I'm marrying Petra because I love her…"

"What about it?" Her grey eyes swung to fix at the man's lips as he spoke, gazing back at the drink pouring into her empty cup until it was filled, and her fingers touched the glass before wrapping around it and taking a first sip from her second cup.

"I actually proposed to her as a  _Thank You_." He answered with honesty, "After all she's done for me while I was in the hospital, I thought I should do something in return to thank her…" Just when the bitter words slipped through his lips, he replaced the dryness of his mouth with the savor of his whisky.

"Don't you think you hastened with taking such decision? Marriage is not a game." She gave him a look of reproach.

"I know…that's why I'm hoping I won't regret it later." Levi was rather honest in expressing his concerns to the girl, strangely being comfortable doing so.

"Life sucks anyway…It doesn't matter what you do, it's never easy. I went through a lot of shit…still going through more."

"Now that I answered your question, it's time for you to tell me about you…" Of course, he had an aim by giving her the answer;  _to know more about her._

"Where do I even begin?" Aware of his intentions, Mikasa didn't have an escape this time. She would have to tell him,  _at least_  a little bit, "My life has always been a mess, starting off with my family." Tapping on the edges of her cup, she picked it up and stole another sip before finishing. "Till now…my mother's husband has no idea that I'm not his daughter…"

"Oh…" Though she only murmured a couple of words, it stole his interest briskly, and he ordered another cup of whisky, listening carefully to her.

"I was nine when I found out…'Dad' wasn't home…there was only mom and I. I was playing in my room when I heard some noise downstairs. When I went to check…I found my mother talking to my  _supposedly_  uncle…They were arguing, actually, but I couldn't hear what they were saying, until my uncle started shouting…"

* * *

_"Mikasa is my daughter…No one's going take her away from me. Neither you, nor your husband are going to stand in my goddamned way…You lied to me…told me she was his,…but now that I finally found out the truth…I'm going to take her…" The man's eyes glowed with rage and madness, struggling to push the woman out of his way, but she kept forcing him to the door with a weak push that didn't work either way._

_"Mom!…" The terrified tone and look on the girl's eyes brought silence at last, when the two grown-ups stared at her._

_"Mikasa,…go back to your room." The mother said in a warning tone to her daughter, she refused to listen, though. "Mikasa!" Before the man would dare to approach her, she hurried to her daughter, standing as a barrier between them._

_"Mikasa…come with me…Come with me, darling…" The man's tone softened when addressing it to the little girl, but that was never enough to wipe the horrified look in her eyes._

_"No…" Her small hands tugged on her mother's shirt, only fear could be heard in her voice._

_"I won't hurt you…I'm your father…." He divulged._

_"Shut up!…Get out of my house!…Mikasa is no one's daughter but mine…She's mine…and she's staying with me." The mother said protectively. "You're making her scared…"_

* * *

"He asked me to come with him, but I was so scared, so scared and I only wanted my mother…When he left, she made me swear not to let my 'dad' know about this, and that was when I knew…it was all true. My uncle wasn't lying,…I could tell just by looking at her, she was  _so_  terrified. She never thought he'd know…and I…could never look at her the same way again…I could never stand sitting at one table with my family…I could never consider it my family anymore…" She broke her words, moistening her throat with her drink. Levi's blue eyes were watching her, curiously, patiently, with eagerness glowing in them, eagerness to hear more about her.

"I left home once I started attending high school. I moved to live with my best friend…My life was good so far…I grew up and got a job…I also had a successful relationship back then, one that I will never forget. I got engaged last year to my boyfriend…Our wedding was supposed to be next spring." She paused, her eyes wiggling at the derelict memories, "…I loved my fiancé, a lot." She confessed, lips pressing tightly before parting again, "…I could forget about all the hard times I've went through in the past…I was so naive and I believed he loved me too…until that day came" She swallowed the pain in her throat and pushed the words out of her mouth, "…My neighbor came and told me-she told me that my fiancé was cheating on me…"

"…" To his own shock, Levi's eyes widened in response to her words, to think someone would dare to cheat on a girl like her, -a girl who was starting to get him mesmerized by just hearing her voice- It was rather shocking news.

"I didn't want to believe her…She hated me,…but then she said that her husband once was cheating on her too, and that she would never want to see a girl going through the same, even if it was me…" She sipped her drink again, attempting to stop the burn in her throat, "She…had a friend whom worked in the same company as him…and told her he was having an affair with one of the workers. Of course, she didn't tell me about this until she confirmed it. She had to follow him with her friend and when they made sure, she came to tell me…" The woman placed her cup down, a blurry reflection of her eyes showing on the surface of her drink. "He called me that day to tell me he was going to be late because of work and wouldn't come back home that night, but my neighbor told me he went to a hotel with that woman…"

Levi clicked his tongue in disgust at her words, finishing his second cup and glaring at nothing in particular.

"I couldn't sleep for the whole night…I was trying so hard to convince myself that none of that was happening…My neighbor stayed there with me and in the next morning, I made a decision…I took my car, and went straight ahead to that hotel. I had to see for myself…"  _I still had hope in him_ , "I didn't even have to go inside. When I parked my car, I saw him through the window…standing in the balcony." The rage she felt had her grip tightening around the empty cup -it could break if ever she'd tighten her grasp any more-, but she loosened her grip and let her head fall back, releasing a long sigh, "I felt as if…as if I just got shot in the chest…I froze, thinking about what I should do…and then I just stepped out of my car. I pulled my phone and decided to call him…"

* * *

_"Yes, I'm fine…so, what are you doing?" She was having a hard time keeping her voice cheerful._

_"I'm about to have another meeting in five minutes. I can't come home today, either. Sorry, honey, I'll do my best to come tonight." He sounded apologetic, such great performance._

_"That's okay, but before your meeting starts, would you take a look down over here?"_

_"What?"_

* * *

"He looked down…and saw me there. He was speechless, and all the hopes I had left were gone at that point. I just…removed that ring and discarded it. I told him to come and take it back…because we were done, then I left…" She looked back down at the counter, raising her cup in the air, "I got back home fast…and then…something else happened that day…I had…an abortion." She finished her whisky in a one-shot and placed the cup back down, her hair falling to the front and hiding her eyes from him, now done to even ask for another cup.

"…Abortion?" Levi murmured with a raised brow, she nodded.

"I was two months pregnant" She professed, "…The only thing I probably didn't regret…was that I didn't tell him about it…and then…everything was…over."

"…Just like that? He didn't try to talk to you?" It lacked sense. Unless the guy was a total jerk, he should have at least tried to call.

"Why would he?...There was nothing left to fix anyway. I found out about everything. It was awful to go through that shit, but luckily I had good friends, they stood by my side and helped me forget about what happened. I just had to start a new life…and here I am now…sitting with you and telling you my story." She probably told more than she was supposed to, but it made her feel better at least.

Sharing a moment of a silent acknowledgment, there was a glow in Levi's eyes, a glow of satisfaction. He met this girl, Mikasa. She was a mystery, full of secrets behind those dim, nonchalant gazes. But now the mystery was solved and he could read her like a book. He could understand the meaning behind the words. He could read between the lines and see the truth; that she was a broken soul, broken, but strong. Solving this mystery didn't kill his interest in reading more, only had it growing bigger. There were still other mysteries to solve, no doubt about that. He admired her for who she was, because anyone else would have mostly given up, "You're a tough girl." He couldn't put it in better words, and his fingers tickled the edges of her hair, moving it away so he could finally see her eyes.  _Only an idiot would let a girl like you go._

"I know…That's what I keep telling myself." There was a mixture of seriousness and banter in her words, and her eyes met his for a long moment. Both fell silent, letting their eyes speak with the sudden urge within them of lips touching, just like back then in the morning, but it only remained a dying desire inside them, because neither dared to do it, not when Alex wasn't there to push them to one another again and make that as a sorry excuse for a second kiss. The staring contest was still ongoing, till her eyes dropped from his to fix on his slightly parted lips, silently expressing her brutal desire to kiss him, until her eyes spot the ring on his finger, resonating in her head the fact that this man was engaged. This man would soon get married to another woman, and she had no right to think about anything between them.

"I…have to go back to my suite, now. I'm tired." Breaking through the silence, she mumbled, getting up of the chair.

"Want me to walk you to the door?" He offered, leaving his seat, too.

"No, thanks…I'll manage myself. I don't want to bother you with my bullshit anyway." She gave off a light smile.

"Shut up. I'll make sure you won't fall asleep in the corridor again." He still insisted, and she couldn't help a chuckle at his remark. "Remember…we're family anyway. Give me your hand." Levi's hand was inviting hers to join it, the hand he put the ring on, and Mikasa's hesitation scratched harder, "What? Are you feeling shy so suddenly?"

She gazed up at him, picturing the small adventure she had in the morning, and how much fun she had. It was a push for her to take his hand again, "Okay. Let's go back home, honey."

"Are you still wearing that necklace?"

"Ah! Yes."

"Good. Don't take it off, it' a symbol of our family."

"The strangers' family!…"

They could still feel the embarrassment when remembering what happened at that restaurant; the gazes everyone was aiming at them. They laughed, though. Their hands parted when Mikasa finally arrived at her suit, and she stood at her door before walking inside.

"Thank you…" She said.

"There's no need to…"

"Well,…good night." Even though she still wanted to chat with him, and she knew he wanted the exact same thing, it was probably the main reason why she had to leave him for now.

"Goodnight." Yet none of them moved, their eyes staring into one another's, until Levi turned to leave. The door shut instantly, blaming the drink for all the foolish thoughts she was having, and she was about to go and sit, when she heard a knock on the door. Surprisingly, it was Levi.

"Yes?" Her heartthrobs quickened, sending questioning gazes at him.

"I was…wondering if you're coming tomorrow night."

"What?" His question was a bit vague, and she demanded an explanation.

"The fete…They're setting up a fete for the hotel's fifth anniversary…will you be there?" He explained.

"Oh, Right!...I guess so…Why?" She noticed the plaque fixed on the wall when she was walking to the restaurant, but she never thought of going.

"I was just wondering…Okay, good night." Levi seemed nervous, but satisfied, "I'll see you tomorrow night, then."

"Uh! Sure." There was an uncontrollable, dumb smile on her lips while her eyes followed the man walking away. She pushed the door closed before he'd notice her staring, she froze, almost capable of listening to her heartbeats. Why was she even feeling that happy to know he was asking about her? Why would she even care if he wanted to see her again? Why would she even want him to feel attracted to her? Why did  _she_  feel so attracted to him? Questions roamed inside her head for the whole night, but never got answered—or at least not yet.

* * *

Despite Mikasa's absence in the town, her apartment wasn't left empty. Her friends had been sleeping there day by day to keep an eye on her stuff. Krista was, as usual, making breakfast that morning when Annie walked to the kitchen with half-opened eyes and a messy hair, taking a seat so lazily.

"When did we even sleep last night?" She mumbled blurrily.

"I don't know…Did we even sleep?" They were rather enjoying their girls' night to even think about sleep, which resulted in them staying up all night. They slept for barely a couple of hours.

"I'm so tired…Hurry up and make that breakfast." The blonde demanded, resting her head on the table. Suddenly, the two heard the phone ringing in the bedroom.

"That's my phone. Come and watch over the food, I'll go check that." Krista addressed the other girl and walked to the bedroom to get her phone from the nightstand. She opened her messages to find it was from Mikasa. She sent her two pictures of two dresses, and before she'd wonder why her friend sent those pictures, she got a call from her, "Mikasa?" She answered.

"Good morning. Did you get the pictures?" Meanwhile, she was in her bedroom, the two dresses in the pictures laid on her bed.

"Yes. What are they for?" Krista asked, walking her way back to the kitchen, quite uncertain of leaving Annie to take care of cooking.

"I need your help…There's going to be a fete in the hotel tonight, and I can't choose which dress to wear." Tapping on her chin, she sighed and sat down on her bed, ruffling the fabric of one of the dresses.

"Oh! Give me a moment. Annie is here too. She's the designer in here, so, of course, she must have a good taste in choosing clothes. I'll call you back, okay?" She eyed her friend whom was standing at the stove and aimed at her to come.

"I'm waiting." Mikasa hung up.

"What is it?" Turning off the stove, Annie walked to her friend.

"So, Mikasa sent me pictures of two dresses and she wants us to choose which one she should wear for a fete tonight." Krista explained to her friend.

"Let me see." She took the phone from the other, examining the dresses carefully. One of them was a crimson, close-fitting, halter mini-dress, and the other was a black, strapless, plunging, with a knee-length skirt dress. The two dresses were too gorgeous. It would feel so unfair to pick only one of them.

"I like them both…" Krista mumbled in confusion from the other side, repeatedly, looking at the pictures with uncertainty before making any decisions.

Mikasa was tapping her fingers on the nightstand, waiting for the call from her friends patiently, eyeing her cell's screen constantly, until she finally received the waited call. "So?"

"Listen, Mikasa" It was Annie talking, "…Honestly, they're both beautiful, but here's a thing…if you're actually wearing a dress for a fete, go with the black one." Annie paused before adding, "But…if you have another intention behind wearing the dress…let's say for example…charming a guy, maybe…I guess the crimson one will do great."

"What?" Mikasa raised an eyebrow at her friend's remark, almost choking on her own breath.

"Is he the one you were talking to yesterday?" Krista was also listening to the call, turning on the loudspeaker so she could talk to Mikasa.

"Krista…what even…" Flustered, Mikasa denied.

"Besides, red actually makes you look gorgeous, Mikasa." Annie muttered.

"I second that. Hail the Red Queen!" Krista couldn't agree more with Annie.

"Hail the Red Queen! Hail the Red Queen!" A sudden, sharp voice joined the party. It was Eren, walking into the kitchen. "Who's the Red Queen we're talking about by the way?"

"It's Mikasa. She asked us to pick a dress for her, and we told her she looks good in red." Krista clarified to the boy.

"Ah! Totally, red makes her look sexy. The scarf I gave her is enough proof."

"See Eren said you look sexy wearing red." Annie said in almost a whisper.

"Yeah, I heard that." And she laughed at it too.

"He's right…Your body is in a good shape. That red dress will make everyone drool when seeing you, honey."

"I see…thank you guys…I got to go now. Tell Armin I said hi."

"Okay! Have fun! And don't forget telling me about what happens at the fete, in  _full_  detail." Krista enjoined.

"I'll try…Can't promise you anything, though. Take care…I'll talk to you later." With the end of the call, Mikasa stood up, taking one final glance at the two dresses on her bed, a tiny smirk crossing her face, "The red one it is…" She mumbled to herself, removing the black dress from the bed to put it back into the closet, the place where it should have stayed in since the beginning.

* * *

With the nightfall, the couple was getting prepared for the night, but for different purposes. Levi was dressed in his black suit, walking out of the bedroom to see his fiancée sitting on the couch while wearing her high-heel sandals.

"I won't be that late. The meeting will take about an hour and a half. I'll try to come back as quick as possible so we can still enjoy the night together." The woman straightened up and walked to her fiancé, fixing his tie around his neck.

"No pressure, take as long as you want. Your work is more important than a boring fete." He said nonchalantly.

"You're still going to attend this boring fete, though." Petra eyed her fiancé with a raised eyebrow.

"It's because I got nothing else to do." He wouldn't stay in his suite, either way.

"Don't drink…" She warned.

"I won't…"

"I know you did last night, you smelled. I just didn't want to point it out."

"I only drank two cups. I wasn't drunk…" He said in defense.

"Should I stay here and watch over you like a little kid? We agreed that you should keep away from drinking. Doesn't matter how much you drink." The woman placed her hands on her hips, eyeing him with disappointment.

"Fine, I won't drink tonight…" He grumbled.

"Okay. I have to go now…Let's go together." Wrapping her arm around his, the couple walked outside their suite, and Levi glanced at Mikasa's door quickly, hoping to see her in the fete tonight. When the two were finally in the lobby, Levi walked her to the door and stood there as she kissed him goodbye, forcing himself to return the kiss.

"I'll see you later. I love you." She said in a whisper, giving him another kiss before she finally left.

"Take care…and enjoy the meeting." He put his hands in his pockets and walked into the restaurant where the fete was planned to be. It was quite a nice view seeing that so many people were there along with the nice decoration, and most importantly, there were enough tables for everyone. "At last, they brought more tables." Taking a seat on one of the empty tables, his eyes examined the surroundings slowly, searching for the woman he was impatiently waiting to see. Due to going to the gym in the morning, he hadn't met her yet today, and he was stuck for the rest of the day with his fiancée after all. He couldn't possibly meet the other woman. He had only an hour and a half now to see her, before Petra would come back, and she'd better show up soon.

"Sir, want me to get you a drink before we serve the dinner." Levi heard the waiter asking him, breaking what kind of focus he had in finding the girl to give more attention to the man in front of him.

"No, thanks…." The waiter walked off, leaving Levi with his legs crossed and almost fingers too, for he was praying for the girl to show up.  _Why isn't she here yet?_  Checking the watch on his wrist, it was nearly nine. Perhaps he was just being impatient? Levi heaved a desperate sigh, tapping the ground impatiently with his ankle, observing his surroundings before his eyes landed on a heavenly, stunning, tall woman standing at the entrance.

Her hair was gathered in a back braid bun, only her bangs were still down. There was a small handbag in her hand, and her eyes were wandering around the place as she stood tall with the high-heel she was wearing. She didn't wear so much make up, just a light lip gloss and eyeliner. She was the pure beauty in a human figure, and Levi examined her body from bottom to top, her long, curvaceous, bare legs which showed only the skin from her mid thigh and down, the crimson color covered the rest of them, her hourglass waist and average sized breasts, not that he was staring at them, but the dress she was wearing was revealing her cleavage and a tiny bit of her abdomen, definitely eye-catching. The man had been staring at her ever since she stood there, until she lifted her hand to wave at him. He caught his breaths and made his way to the woman, and she met him halfway.

"Good evening." She greeted in a firm tone.

"Yeah…" He was still fighting for his breaths that the words got lost inside his mouth.

"Petra didn't come yet?" She noticed the woman's absence, being certain of how she wouldn't let her fiancé stand alone in the middle of this crowd where so many other women would have their eyes on him.

 _"You…you look beautiful in red_." He wanted to say, and he unconsciously did. Ignoring the female's question, and drowning in her charm, his lips moved on their own to compliment her, which caused him a strange feeling below the stomach, for he never intended to say those words out loud.

"…Oh!...Thank you. You look handsome too." She returned the compliment, squeezing her handbag in nervousness. She managed to play it cool and acted confident, though.

"Red…it suits you…" Levi wasn't one to be good with words, and he was putting so much effort in complimenting her in a way that wouldn't sound like flirting. He probably failed.

"Really? Well,…I actually hesitated to wear this dress…" Even though her friends insisted she would look gorgeous in it, Mikasa was feeling slightly guilty, because like Annie said, there was a small urge within her telling her to wear the dress only to seduce Levi, to seduce an engaged man, a man she wasn't supposed to be attracted to.

"No. You look good in it…" He said, firing a blush across her cheeks.

"So…are we going to stand or…?" Putting a stop to the awkward mood, she changed the subject.

"Come. Let's go sit,…my table is empty and I would appreciate some company." He turned around and walked ahead to the table, but the female hesitated.

"What about,…you know,…her?"

"She has a meeting right now…come on." He assured her and continued to walk. She joined him in a bit, knowing very well that Petra wouldn't be pleased if she'd catch them sitting together in her absence.

"I haven't seen you today. Weren't here?" She had a slight hope to meet him in the restaurant when she was having breakfast, or when she went out on a walk again, but sadly she didn't see him.

"Yeah! I went to the gym…I would have gone to the hotel's, but I prefer the one I usually go to…" It was also a reason to stay away from his fiancée, just for a while till he could clear his thoughts, because ever since he got back to his suite last night, he could only think about Mikasa.

"I see…"

"I haven't been to one for a while now. It felt great, at least regained some of my lost energy."  _And realized how much I disliked sleeping with Petra last night._

"That's great…" Mikasa's mind wasn't functioning correctly, and so the words kept betraying her. He noticed.

"Are you nervous?" Noting how calm and short her replies were, he asked.

"…No. Why?" She denied.

"I'm just making sure that I won't have to walk you back to your suite tonight, as well." He said, attempting to break through her nervousness.

"Oh! No, I'm…I'm alright today." His words had a smile tugging at her lips which she slowly gave in to.

 _She has a beautiful smile_. Levi wondered if it would be too much to ask her to smile again and whether it would be awkward to tell her to smile more, because it suited her. Everything she did suited her, "It's a shame, though…" He blurted again.

"…"

"For your ex-fiancé to have cheated on a girl like you…" He finished his words, realizing how wrong they sounded too late to take them back.

"…It's funny,…Sometimes, guys are so weak…so weak, they give in to their lustful desires for the sake of a transient relationship, ruining a girl's life…" She frowned, for she had been one who watched her life being ruined by the person she loved the most.

"That doesn't mean there aren't any good guys out there." He certainly wasn't one of them.

"I know…I even know some, but I'm not sure if I would actually feel the same way if ever I get in another relationship…or if I would be enjoying it as much, either." Her eyes met his then, "I just learned to be more careful with whom I'm dealing with…and I know that…no matter what happens, I won't,  _ever_ , get hurt so badly again."

"Confident…" He mumbled with an impressed tone, his eyes on hers, before the hotel's manager walked in, getting everyone's attention, including the two of them, and he stood in front of the microphone to say a couple of words.

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen. It's a pleasure to have you all gathered tonight for the celebration of our hotel's fifth anniversary. For the past five years, our hotel has always been in the top. Every year, more guests would come and it's such a big honor to know that you have found your comfort in our hotel. We have a quick service. We provide all the kinds of services you need, for you and your lovers, friends, family…for everyone. If someone stayed for the first time in our hotel, they always come back with more people next time. It's a pleasure to me as the hotel's manager, that our guests are so numerous…even the tables weren't enough for most of them…which we luckily fixed that and bought more tables. The most important thing to say is that so many workers have been helping to build up this hotel, and make it reach the top in a matter of few years, so I want to thank you, thank all of our guests who come several times. As for the new guests, please, do visit us again. We will be happy to see you more often, bring your dear ones too, and we'll make sure to give you the best service of all time. Have a nice stay, and thank you. Enjoy your dinner." Bowing his head respectfully to the guests, the manager was rewarded with applause. And shortly, the waiters arrived to serve the tables with the promised dinner for every guest. Even the ones who didn't come to the celebration were being served in their rooms, adding a light musical touch to set the mood for them.

"I'm in love with this place so far…" She admitted, and Levi couldn't agree more with her.

"True." He nodded. Their table was finally served, but neither of them started eating. "Do you usually go to the gym?" He snapped the question.

"I used to go with my fiancé, but after breaking up with him I haven't gone to it…I was too busy with work anyway." She wanted to ask why he was asking her that, but decided to keep silent, not to let him know she was that interested in everything he said.

"Maybe you should come with me some time…We can exercise together." He suggested.

"Oh? Why me? Why don't you ask your fiancée to go with you?"

"She's here for work, and she barely got time to hang out anyway…" And he'd be less concerned about her walking on him sitting with the other woman.

"I'm pretty sure she still wouldn't be happy to know I'm going with you." Though Mikasa wanted to say  _yes, I'd like to go with you_ , she didn't want to make herself sound like an easy prey—or a slut.

"She doesn't have to know…We can just meet in the gym instead of going together." Levi wasn't good with words, and he realized that all of his intentions to not sound flirty were going in vain, so he decided to say it simply.

"…You mean like…a secret meeting?"  _Or rather, a secret date._

"…Whatever you want to call it." He shrugged.

She smirked at his honesty and forwardness, "Okay. When is that?"

He was in denial for a second, for he never thought she'd say yes, "Tomorrow,…are you free?"

"I'm free every day."

"Well, then be it, tomorrow…at nine in the morning…I'll leave the address of the gym for you with the receptionist." His chest hurt slightly, feeling a cold breeze along his back. He was excited.

"…Alright."  _I can't wait._ She wanted to add.

"Just to make it clear…it's not a date."  _It totally is a date._

"Of course not…We're just going to the gym to exercise, and it happens that we meet each other there." She said in a playful voice.

"Exactly!"

"Alright…now let's have our dinner." Their chat continued as they ate their dinner, enjoying their talk so far about multiple subjects. Some of the guests who finished their dinner were now dancing to the music in couples, Levi and Mikasa had enough watching them, until Mikasa decided to talk.

"Shall we dance?" She invited the man.

"What?" He arched a brow at her suggestion, for he wasn't the kind to dance.

She left her seat and walked to him, her hand held out to his, "Let's dance before your fiancée arrives…" With those words being said, Levi was convinced, and he took her hand, standing up and walking with her to join the rest couples.

His hand on her waist, and that was satisfying him. His other hand locked fingers with her, as she used a hand to rest on his shoulder, and they moved in harmony with the music, just as if they danced together before. They were so perfect, their moves matched, their bodies aware of each next move, and the necklaces they were wearing tangled, just the way their affection towards one another was now shown in their acts, stealing a sneaky touch whenever they had the opportunity to. They were alone in a whole different world, a world they were the only ones who existed in, and nothing else mattered to them. The world which Petra didn't exist in, only the two of them, the world which Petra was standing out of, which she could only watch from the distance, with a burn in her chest, her fiancé dancing with another woman, her fiancé having another woman in his arms, her fiancé touching another woman. The tears were glistening in the fire of her eyes, and she left before any would fall. She left because that was the easiest thing to do, because she couldn't face him, and she left him caged in his little world with the other woman.

"Did you enjoy the kiss as much as I did?" His question sent a sparkle in her eyes, and she looked at him, her heart pounding, and he could feel it against his chest.

"What kiss?" She faked ignorance, "In the park?...That wasn't even close to a kiss." The raven haired was nowhere near to hide the blush that started painting her cheeks, for he was bringing that now, indirectly admitting he kissed her, but she loved to play it all ignorant to what he was saying. She refused to give him the opportunity of saying  _it was all your fault_  for latter matters.

"Well, then…" A little bit of disappointment in his tone was present, for he felt somewhat rejected by her, perhaps he was going too fast? Perhaps her approval to go with him to the gym didn't change the fact that they were still strangers? But there was that same desire in his eyes, the same desire she had in her eyes last night, the desire which they both buried within them, that desire which she successfully hid and erased every small trace of it in her gaze, but he failed to do so. It was still burning in his chest, unbearably painful, and his hand dropped from her waist to reach up for the back of her head, lowering her head to his, and finally shutting that desire with an intentional, passionate kiss, lasting for seconds of need that felt like hours, their breaths were heavy against one another, and they parted their lips for the pleasure grew uncontrollable and had to end, "How about this then?" He whispered, his words laced with dissatisfaction.

Her eyelids lifted to reveal those grey irises, flooding with lust and ardor, "That wasn't enough." She brushed her lips against his, and let them touch and melt against one another's, sweet and hot with gentle bites and tugs. No limits could be found to that kiss. It was everlasting and growing wild, scratching their cravings and need to touch and not only kiss. The tips of his fingers trailed her hips, and she squeezed his shoulders, hissing into the kiss which she broke so hardly. "Levi…" Her voice was weak, and his fingers were trailing the bare skin of her long back, "Stop," She begged, and his touch went lower, "…you're…" His lips wouldn't part from hers, and she fought for breath and words in the intensity of the kiss, "You're turning me on…"

"Too late"  _I already am turned on._  He stepped across the lines which he had put for himself. Not minding where they were, he kissed her again and again, stealing a touch from the only bare skin he could find on her back, a touch which sent a shiver along her spine and pushed her to stop.

"Let's…" She breathed, her breaths hot against his mouth, "Let's go to my suite…" It was all it took the two of them to push through the dancing crowd out of the restaurant. The moment they entered the elevator she was pushed against the solid wall with his body slamming to hers. Their lips remained restless once joining again, his tongue licked off her lip gloss and devoured the tasty flavor of her lips, their bodies pushing through the length of the corridor, dropping her handbag to the ground once her hands found the key, and she opened the door they didn't waste a second to close once entering.

Her fingers dug on his tie, unbinding it, while his pulled her hair down. Their bodies fell onto the nearest couch, him on top, his hands sneaking beneath her dress and touching the soft skin of her thighs and the strap of her underwear. He wanted her, he wanted her naked beneath him, and she wanted him too, exposing his bare chest under the shirt which remained open now. Her hands were finally free to touch his hot and muscled body, discarding his tie to the ground. The kissing fight they were having lasted for a few more seconds before their lips fell apart, now supporting their hands and feeling each other's skin with their tongues and lips. He passed his tongue over her neck, and she nibbled at his ear while pulling his shirt and jacket off feeling his shoulder blades and slipping another hand to his back.

"Your smell…is so nice…and intoxicant." Inhaling her delicious scent, his words singed the skin of her neck and tickled her ear. She breathed hot against his ear.

"Levi-" She moaned his name in the faintest tone ever, her nails digging into the skin of his back, heavily gasping for air, her thigh rubbing against his, and his hand was reaching higher below her dress, up to her waist and going higher, "S-Stop-" She breathed, the desire within her mixing with the sudden guilt, for she was letting an engaged man touch her and do as he pleased with her, for she wasn't stopping him and even going for it with him. "You shouldn't…you… _you have a fiancée_." At those words, everything stopped, and their desire died in an instant, bringing them back to reality, kicking them out of the small world they created in that dance, the world which they owned together, without anyone interrupting them, the world which sadly never existed.

His nose traced the length of her neck and up, nuzzling it against hers and kissing her. She didn't stop him. She returned that kiss, gripping tightly on his hair while so, and she pulled his head back, her eyes meeting his, stroking the soft skin of his cheek with a frown. "I'm sorry. You should go…"  _I don't want you to go._

"If that's what you want."  _You asked to come here, though._ Within one second, his body was off of hers without saying anything else. She fixed her dress and sat up in a hurry, panting. He buttoned his shirt, shame keeping him from looking back at her. It felt so strange, just a moment ago, they were sharing a passionate moment together, just a moment ago they unleashed their desires. It was sad how a simple word cut off everything beautiful in that moment.  _He was engaged_.

And he left without looking back. He left without a word, because if he stopped, nothing was going to stop him from going back to her, nothing she'd say was going to stop him from having her all beneath him. It was better to leave just like that.

* * *

Lost and frustrated, Levi walked to his suite looking miserably. Unexpectedly, he found Petra in there, sitting on the couch and drinking.  _When did she come back?_

"I didn't see you when you got back…" He gulped, walking to her. "Why didn't you come to the restaurant?"  _Did she see me?_

"Of course you didn't see me…you were too busy staring at  _her_." She pressed, filling up another cup of whisky, but before she'd drink it, Levi's held her hand and stopped her.

"Stop…"

She slipped her hand out his grip, angrily. She stood up and glared up at him, observing his figure in silence and disgust.

"Go to bed." He was in no mood to argue, she was drunk and he had no time to deal with it. Levi simply turned away and walked to the bathroom.

"Where's your tie?" She asked, bluntly.

He paused and turned around, "What?"

"…Your tie, Levi. You were wearing a tie before I left…" She repeated, sure as hell of what she was saying, because she fixed it for him herself. He couldn't fool her.

He couldn't fool her, because he didn't even notice he forgot his tie.

* * *

_I opened the door to tell him…he forgot his tie, but he wasn't there. I wanted to go to his suite and give it back—but what if—what if she was there already? There was no way I would take that risk. It was my fault. I told him to come then simply sent him out. I can't tell what's making me feel worse; that I wanted to touch an engaged man, or that I didn't let him touch me._

* * *

_To Be Continued_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops! Probably you were waiting for them to do the frick frack. Haha! Sorry, this chapter was just a warm up before the actual smut comes -next chapter that is- nevertheless hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> Please, leave a review! I would like to know your thoughts and feelings about this chapter. Also, it motivates me to keep writing.


	3. Intoxicant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here comes a new update. (: Enjoy!

**_ Part III:  _ ** _ Intoxicant _

* * *

Insufferable throbbing in the chest, eyes severely maintaining a calm contact with the other, even winking felt forbidden, and he attempted to drop her a few words before she beat him to it.

"Don't look at me like that. Where's your tie?"  _Why are your lips ruddy? And why does your shirt look messy?_ The unuttered words bitterly birched her heart, because deep inside, she knew the answer.  _Please, don't tell me you were with her. Don't tell me you kissed her. Don't tell me you let her touch you—you… my fiancé._ Unspoken but easily read in her eyes, the words were like a rope wrapped around her throat, choking her so silently, murdering her from within.

"I took it off…" Murmuring, his hand went to sense the absence of the fabric around his neck. He added, "I must have forgotten it in the restaurant." He claimed absurdly, but he could already hint disbelief in her eyes.

_Don't lie to me. But I don't want to hear the truth either._

There was a knock on the door, followed by silence. The conversation was cut, and the time froze for both of them. They shared the prediction of who might be behind the door, and if their prophecy had any chance to be true, it would only mean one thing for their relationship, the end.

 _Please, don't be Mikasa._ They prayed in the depths of their silence, and none of them had the bravery to answer the door. None of them had bravery to see what was waiting for them behind that door. The future of their relationship was on the edge. Opening the door would either be the last push off the cliff which ends everything, or a faint light of a new hope for them to carry on.

"Room service!" A voice broke through from behind the closed door, settling a cold feeling below the stomach of each of them. The voice was unrecognizable.

_Huh?_

"Did you order anything?" His pulse almost stopped, when she shook her head in denial. He inhaled, heavily, and made a decision to walk to the door and answer it.

The shorter the distance got, the faster his heartthrob went. He stood in front of the door, with a sharp exhale, he wrapped his fingers around the knob, turning it around, and at last opened the door.

"Good evening, sir. You forgot your tie in the restaurant, so here it is. I brought it to you." The employee said with a smile, holding up the tie to him. He glanced at it almost too quickly, quite convinced she was mistaken but she wasn't. It was, indeed, his tie.

Unsure of the real scene, he reacted quickly to cut off any more doubts Petra might be having, "Ah! Right, I was actually going back to get it just now. Thanks." Releasing one last sigh, he watched the employee as she walked away from the suite. Levi made a step out for a moment to stand in the corridor, only to catch Mikasa peeking through her door. She was smirking, and the game was at last solved. She was the one who sent the tie with the employee. It was a smart move of her, and, despite being frustrated, he was also thankful to her, for she saved him from another embarrassing moment with his fiancée.

Glimpsing down at the tie, he closed the door and walked back inside.

"So… it was in the restaurant?" Petra's tone wasn't holding the hints of uncertainty any longer, which gave Levi a warm sensation of relaxation, but she asked nevertheless.

"I told you. The air was heavy, and I couldn't handle it, so I took it off." Gaining back his lost confidence, Levi spoke, making one last attempt to convince his fiancée with his buff.

"Well, how was the fete?" Brushing off what small suspects she was still having, the bitter jealousy and silenced urge to slap him, Petra rolled the engagement ring in her finger, advancing in slow steps towards him. She held the tie in his hand and slipped it out of his hold, letting it fall on the floor. Her eyes sought for his, hands tugging at his collar.

"It was good, but would have been better if you were there." Levi passed his hand over her hair, and the disappointment he felt right away was unsupportable. The difference he felt when his fingers ran along its length. Her hair wasn't long enough, soft, but not like Mikasa's. He was disappointed and upset. He wanted her to be Mikasa. He wanted Mikasa in her stead, but he couldn't have her. He wished to forget her, just for one second, just so he could live one second with Petra without craving for the touch of another woman. She closed her eyes and buried her face to his neck. Her nose, her lips, everything was so different. "You should have come." He managed to say, but he lied. He didn't want her to come. He wished she came earlier, before he'd set his desire free, before he'd give in to her touch, before he'd kiss her, before he'd dance with her, before he'd talk to her, before he'd met her in there. He wished she came earlier when the fete was about to start. If she did, if only she didn't leave him, he wouldn't be lusting for another woman now. Her lips placed a kiss to his neck, another one lower, and another one. He wanted to push her away. He wanted to tell her he didn't want her. He was feeling guilty, even guiltier because the only guilt he felt was not giving Mikasa what he'd been giving Petra. Her hands eased the way for her lips with every button that opened. "We could have danced together." He cursed himself endlessly for his biggest lie.

He never loved dancing, but with her, he did. He wasn't a smooth talker, but with her, he wanted to be. He wasn't a greedy person, but with her, he was. He wasn't one to give in to his desires, but with her, he did. If only that  _her_  was Petra, because the only one he felt that way with was Mikasa. So strange yet so great, how fast everything happened. Just a few days ago he didn't know she existed, but now she was everywhere. When his eyes closed, he'd see her, haunting his dreams. When he opened his eyes, she wouldn't be there, but her scent would. Her scent and touch was always present, ghost yet real. He'd thought his hands were rough, but they still felt so soft and tender when running through the black locks of her hair, lost in their length like lost eyes in a dark, starless sky. But he found his way back nevertheless, back to the truth. If he'd wish to have anything in this life, he'd only wish to have her, at least for one time, for one day, for one night, for one more kiss, and one more touch. But he knew that wouldn't be enough, because she made him greedy and he wanted her for himself and only him for the rest of life.

It was lust, so why was he feeling his heart so involved?

He would search for an answer, but whenever he'd get so close to find it, he'd lose it again when thinking of her. He would search for an answer, but Petra's touch was distracting him, keeping him for thinking about Mikasa, to remind him with her being his fiancée.

"Let's go to the bedroom and have our own party." She breathed out with swollen lips against his chest.

"Okay." He couldn't say no. He shouldn't say no. He was dragged with hesitant steps to the room, with a confused heart and a lost mind. There was no tension, no desire, no need, just a dead body and an unwanted touch, forced kisses and a guilty wish for this to end. It was a nightmare, but he'd always seen nightmares, they would end when he woke up, become forgotten with time. But this was reality, and, for the first time in forever, he wanted to sleep to run away from it.

* * *

"Breakfast is here." Yet another morning came, burying the pain in yesterday, a pain that still existed today, and would even exist tomorrow, unwanted acts, time would put in the temporary forgotten folder, but would never be erased, except for those who wanted to forget. Petra walked in to the bedroom and jumped to the bed over her sleeping fiancé. "Get up."

"I'll join you in a bit." A tired Levi grumbled in a raspy voice against the pillow, his voice almost muffled.

"Come on. Get up, honey." Petra's hips moved against him in a try to shake him. But her attempt failed and she lowered her head to whisper a few words to his ear, "What do you want to do?"

Surprised by her question, Levi lifted his head off the pillow to look at her, "What do you mean?"

"Where do you want to go today?" She snuggled against him and said in a giggly voice.

"You… don't have work today?" He asked with a hidden, desperate hope that she did.

"Nope! Today's my break. We can at last make up for the time we've wasted." Eagerly, she exclaimed.

"Oh? Is that so?"  _Fuck._

"Did you have any plans for today?" Petra sat up and shifted off of him to the bed.

"Not really—I was planning to go to the gym,"  _with Mikasa._ "But you'd probably want to do something else." Levi turned around so he was lying on his back, eyes meeting hers.

Smiling, Petra shook her head, "No, not at all. I don't want to ruin your plans. I'd really love to go to the gym with you."

"You would?" Levi's tone was dull, and he faked a yawn to prevent her from sensing his impassivity. His plans for the day were already ruined. Having some hope to gain more privacy and freedom in his meetings with Mikasa, Levi had not suspected Petra to take the day off. Though Levi was in turmoil, betting whether Mikasa would come or no, especially after last night and that moment of temptation they shared, he would still wait for her.

"Yes, of course I would. I love exercising with you." She leaned in to kiss him, "Get up now. Let's go have our breakfast then get prepared to go." She kissed him again then left the bed.

"Yeah, I'll join you in a minute." He watched her until she walked out the door, and he cursed his lack of luck and intolerable state of confusion.

* * *

Mikasa, who was awake nearly an hour ago, had finished a quick morning shower when she received a call from her friend, Krista.

 _"Come on, Mikasa. I'm your friend. Tell me what happened!"_ Krista begged. Her curiosity had become a burden since Mikasa last called, leaving her impatiently waiting to hear from her friend about the  _secret guy_.

"Nothing happened. The fete was for the hotel fifth anniversary. They served free dinner for everyone, and that was it." Mikasa wore a sly smirk as she teased Krista, sitting on the bed to brush her hair.

_"You know that's not what I'm asking about. Tell me about the guy!"_

"What guy?" She settled the brush on her lap, amused by listening to the urgent Krista.

_"The one you made us choose an alluring dress for you to seduce him with."_

"And what makes you so sure that I wore that dress to seduce anyone?" She snickered softly.

_"It's all clear from your tone, honey. You suck at hiding things. Now, tell me, is he handsome? What's his name? And what happened till now?"_

"Krista, once I see you again, I'll tell you everything. I have to go for now." She looked over at a gym bag she was placing on the bed as she said.

_"You're going to see him, aren't you?"_

"I'm going to the gym." She clarified, but in other words, she was indeed going to meet him, even though she wasn't sure anymore if he still thought about going there. Canceling their meeting would make her feel guiltier than she already felt about last night.

_"You're going to meet him there? Or are you going with him?"_

"Krista, believe me, I promise that, once I'm back, I'll tell you everything with the boring details. The story has just begun, let it end first, and then hear it full." She continued to tease her friend.

_"You're killing me. I can't wait to know."_

"Bye, Krista. Take care." Knowing she wouldn't stop asking, Mikasa had to end the call herself.

_"Okay, fine, bye."_

Once she hung up, Mikasa got up again to get dressed and dry her hair. Within thirty minutes, she got ready. She made her way to the lobby, and passed by the receptionist as agreed.

"Good morning." She greeted the employee.

"Oh! Good morning, Miss. Mr. Levi said you're going to pass by. He left this for you." The receptionist pulled a paper from the drawer and handed it over to Mikasa.

"Thanks." Mikasa took the paper from her and nodded. The relief that blew within her felt strange yet great. After spending hours thinking whether her words would affect him and get him to change his mind about their plan, she was rather happy to know he didn't. She dared to seduce him, get him turned on, promise him with something she didn't give in the end, and instead, kicked him out so simply. That was so villainous of her, and she kept feeling guilty for it. But it wasn't completely wrong, either.

"Have a good day." The receptionist said, and Mikasa smiled lightly at her then walked away to leave.

The valet met her once she was standing outside. "Good morning, miss. Would you like me to get your car?"

"Yes, please." Mikasa handed him the key to get her car, meanwhile, she decided to read what was written on the paper. Levi wrote down the address for her, she recognized it and then noticed he also left her a side note:

_There's a change in the plans. Petra's coming with me. When you arrive, try to pretend it's a coincidence. Don't you dare change your mind about coming! I'll be waiting for you._

"Oh…"

* * *

After the accident Levi had a few months ago, he was advised to keep away from driving temporarily. Even when he was on his own, he would either take a taxi or just walk. Seeing that Petra decided to come with him, she took care of driving, while he was sitting next to her, but his mind was elsewhere.

"It snowed a lot last night. If it keeps snowing like this, the roads will be blocked by the night." Petra said, attempting to break the calm in the car which had settled for minutes after the drive began, but Levi didn't respond to her, nor did he even hear her. "Where did you spend last Christmas?" Trying to find an interesting subject to talk about, she asked him, but his response was absent again. Her eyes gazed swiftly at him, realizing he was in deep thoughts to even hear her. "Levi!" She called out and he finally heard her.

The palm he was resting his cheek on slipped at the sudden call, "What is it?" He responded.

"What are you thinking about?" Petra shook her head with a grin.

"Nothing…" He shrugged his shoulder and crossed his arms, heaving a sigh for not realizing he was so absent-minded only thinking about her, Mikasa.

"I asked you, 'where did you spend last Christmas?'" Curious to hear his answer, Petra asked him again.

"I don't remember." His reply was rather quick. It sounded more of like riddance than an honest answer.

Raising an eyebrow in disbelief, Petra sighed, "You don't remember? How come? Is it that you spent it with another girl and you don't want to tell me about it?"

"No. I  _just_  don't remember." He grumbled.

Still unconvinced with his obvious lie, Petra decided to carry on with questioning him, "Do I know this girl who made you forget where you've spent last Christmas?"

The question was nothing more than a press on his temper, and he shouted, "Are you fucking deaf? I said I don't remember. Stop fucking assuming things. You sound like an incredulous wife and we're not even married yet!"

Though Petra was only trying to tease him, his reaction was out of extreme anger which never had he ever shown to her before. "Why are you yelling at me? Fine, alright. You don't remember." She yelled defensively, and he managed to calm down, "Were you drunk?"

Breathing in, he exhaled, "Yeah…"

"Oh! Aren't you so lucky? You'd have probably kept getting drunk every night, sleeping and waking up without knowing where you are or what happened to you, without me."

"Yeah, I'm so fucking lucky." He stated with a hint of sarcasm.

* * *

Mikasa was on her way to the gym. Having a lonely drive, she wore her earphones, listening to the weather forecast of the day, and hoping for any good song to play.

_"In the end, we advise you, dear listeners, to stay home for the night because of the possible snowy storm. Stay safe to avoid getting locked into trouble, until tomorrow morning, when the operations of snow removal will begin. Have a good day."_

As if it was planned, once the weather forecast ended, Mikasa received a phone call. The number didn't have a name, and for a second she was about to decline it, thinking it was from her mother, but she recognized it to be one of her friend's, and she answered, "Yes? Ah! Good morning, Rico. Yes. Sorry for not calling… I'm alright. Everything's great. Oh! No, no worries. I'm not that broken girl anymore. I'm currently having a great vacation in one of the most wonderful hotels ever, but I'll make sure to pass by and see you once I'm back. This is definitely going to be the best vacation I've ever had… Okay, bye."

* * *

After Levi arrived with Petra at the gym, Petra was already doing a warm-up on the treadmill, but Levi didn't join her. He decided to sit nearby, his eyes not moving off of the doorway, expecting Mikasa to enter in any moment. Petra noticed, but she wasn't sure yet of the reason behind those gazes.

"Levi, are you going to let me warm up alone? Why are you looking at the door like that?"

"I'm not looking at the door. I'm looking at the snow." He claimed, and added in justification, "Did I ever tell you how much I love snow? I used to spend the whole winter playing outside when I was a kid."

"Oh!" Petra nodded at the new information, "So, you do remember what happened when you were a child, but can't remember what happened last Christmas?"

"Some memories can never be forgotten…" His eyes found their way back to the doorway, waiting for Mikasa who might not even bother to arrive. He was beginning to realize how desperate he was to see her. It was an odd feeling, unexplained and uncertain. Though his wants were growing immense, just gaining a chance to see her would shut his wants for now. He wouldn't ask for more, only for her to come, "Where are you…?" And he found himself wondering so openly.

"Who?" Petra heard him.

There was so little time in his hand to think of a quick, convincing reply, which wouldn't sound like a lie, and he said the first words that came to his mind, "Where are all those great childhood memories, honey!"

Petra didn't suspect he was lying, and she only chuckled before saying, "Oh! Don't worry. We're going to have even better memories together."

His impatience was hitting as strong as a waterfall. He couldn't control it, or stop it. The bigger his impatience got, the lower his expectations went. He would look at the doorway, and hope the person approaching was her, but each time he was wrong, "Probably not coming…"

"Who's not coming?" Petra heard him mumble again, and she was confused.

"Uh…better memories…" He was thinking loudly and if it continued to be like that he would end up in a very embarrassing situation with Petra, one where he'd have zero chances to explain.

"Why not?" The moment Petra asked him that, his eyes spotted the subject of his fantasies walking through the door. He was in a complete denial for a second, certain he was only seeing illusions—the girl had him so trapped—but he wasn't. The realization set the fire within him out, only to give him a blow of a cold breeze.

"Honey, I'll…go to the bathroom for a moment. Keep doing warm-ups. I'll be back." Making a lame excuse to leave, Levi couldn't keep up with the development of the situations, and he found himself already up, walking to Mikasa's direction.

"Okay." He heard Petra say.

Counting the steps that separated them, Levi turned to hide behind a wall. He waited for Mikasa to walk by so cautiously, and, on the right moment, he pulled her by her hand behind the wall with him.

"Levi!" Mikasa gasped.

If happiness existed, he never knew what it was till now, till he saw her. It was the kind of happiness and excitement which caused him to get so flustered, even his attempts at wording were so useless—even unnecessary, because all his lips managed to do at the moment, was joining hers in a long, needy kiss, which she re turned. He had thought she'd reject him, and he was even prepared for it, but he would still kiss her, and try to hold their lips together as long as he could. If it were to be their last kiss, he'd wanted it to last for as long, so he wouldn't regret it later. But she didn't reject him. She welcomed his lips warmly, just as if she shared the same feeling as his. He was relieved. "I thought you weren't coming." He had to break the kiss and ask.

Mikasa passed her tongue over her lips, answering, "Why? Do you think I'm scared of her?"

"No." He smirked, "I know you're not. It's just… never mind." He did not want to talk about it. Last night was making his chest aching, his pride and selfishness. It made him feel stupid and worthless and completely helpless in front of her—He had never felt that way, ever, before, especially not because of a girl.

"Levi," Mikasa could tell he was still upset. She could read it all in his eyes. His eyes were avoiding hers so helplessly, but her hands cupped his cheeks, and she brought his gaze back to her, meeting it with her eyes, "I'm sorry about last night. I really am. It was so stupid of me to just… ask you to leave like that." She was clueless on what to say either. Needless to say, she wasn't good at apologizing. She was embarrassed, still, just thinking about it, but she kissed him again and everything felt alright when he kissed her back. Talking was pointless. For them, a kiss would solve a hundred problems. Their lips fell apart again, catching their breaths.

"You don't have to apologize. It's… actually my fault. It felt like… I was too pushy." He mumbled in a cocky tone.

"No. No, you weren't—I…" Mikasa knew they were both mistaken, one way or another, but it was her fault more than anyone's.

"Fine, then let's stop apologizing." He suggested, figuring out how they both found it hard to express their apology.

"Yeah, that's good."

"Okay, so Petra's over there on the treadmill…" He peeked from behind the wall to make sure she was still there.

"Don't worry. I'll just make it sound like a coincidence. I wanted to spend some time in the gym then I met you out of the blue."

Levi turned around to face her again, "Actually, more like met Petra out of the blue, because I'm supposed to be in the bathroom."

"Oh! Got it! Just don't take so long to come back… She might try to slap me." She scoffed.

"I'm sure you can defend yourself." He said, not in a complimenting way, because he knew, though he only heard her story, she was so strong.

"Alright, I'll go now." Mikasa almost gave in to a smile so uncharacteristically, but she turned around to leave immediately.

"By the way, Mikasa…" He called before she'd leave, "You look… beautiful, today."

"What? I'm not wearing anything special, though." She checked her athletic outfit and looked at him questioningly, wondering whether he was joking, but pretty sure he wasn't.

He showed a small frown, "You don't need to wear anything to look beautiful…"

"Watch it. That's called dirty flirting…" She warned, not exactly unamused.

"It's called stating facts." He claimed.

Mikasa arched her eyebrow in amaze, "How do you know? You didn't see me wearing nothing."

" _Yet_ …"

Within the ashes of their burnt desires, a glimmer of lust sparkled in their eyes. They were stripped of guilt, worn with ego and they felt like the only beings left on earth, daring gazes and hungry bodies. Only containing their rapacity considering the place they were in.

Mikasa turned her back to him, ending the countable seconds of tension they shared, and walked away. She walked straight ahead towards Petra, and tried to sound as plausible as possible when greeting her.

"Good morning, Petra." Mikasa said, setting her gym bag down.

"Oh!  _You_?" Petra responded with a not-so-welcoming tone, "What? Are you stalking Levi or something?"

Mikasa rolled her eyes at Petra's assumption, "If I were stalking Levi, darling, I would be doing it now, instead of coming to talk to you."

"So, you think I'm actually going to believe this is a coincidence?" Petra stepped off the treadmill, her hands on her hips, "You know, I'm not an idiot. For your own good, and ours, stay away from him for the love of god. He's engaged if I may remind you, engaged to me. And all these moves you're making aren't going to fool me. I know exactly what you're trying to do. I'm a girl too, in the end."

Mikasa narrowed her eyes, folding her arms against her chest, "So, you're saying that you know exactly what I'm trying to do, because you tried to get with an engaged guy?"

"No!" Petra exclaimed at Mikasa's comeback, "Excuse me, honey. I'm not that kind of bitches."

"Well, excuse  _you_. Who are you calling a bitch?"

Petra smirked, shortening the distance between the two of them by stepping closer to her, "You listen to me well, Mikasa. If you ever tried, or even thought about getting near Levi again, you have absolutely no idea of what I can do."

Mikasa shrugged her shoulders in nonchalance, "I don't know what makes you think I'm trying to get near him. You're just too obsessed with your fiancé, you think everyone's in love with him."

"How about find yourself someone else's fiancé to mess around with."

"Okay, just to make this clear, I'm not the one who goes to him when feeling lonely. It's him, who always comes to me, because apparently his fiancée is too busy with work to stay with him. So, before blaming it all on me, how about you reconsider your life choices and tell me again whose fault is this?" Mikasa said sharply, drawing silence for an instant.

"Are you… giving me tips on how I should treat  _my_  fiancé?" Though Petra wasn't aiming for things to get worse, Mikasa's words offended her to the point where she was clutching her fist to punch her, but Levi arrived in time and she released her grip.

"Petra! What's happening?" He stood next to her, but she only gazed at him to look back at Mikasa.

"Good morning, Levi." Mikasa greeted, attempting to keep going with their little game.

"Hey! I… didn't think we'd see you here too." Levi's palm rested on the back of his neck, sensing the failure of their plan coming.

"Well, looks like someone else thought so." Mikasa could have ended the argument right then. She could have pretended none of that argument happened, but, uncontrollably, she developed an urge to continue. "Your fiancée… thinks I'm stalking you. Does it look like I'm stalking you, Levi?" Her eyes sought for his and it was as if she was challenging him to choose a side to stand by, hers, or his fiancée's.

Levi parted his lips to say something, but all he could let out was a sigh. He turned, facing Petra, "Now, Petra, what's your problem exactly?"

Petra's eyes widened, unable to believe he was now accusing her of being problematic, "Oh! Right… So, now,  _I_  have a problem. Just… whom do you think you're messing with, a five-year-old child? Even fucking five-year-olds aren't dumb anymore. Levi, instead of asking me about my problem, how about you tell me about yours? It isn't that hard to tell me you hate how I keep getting too busy with work. I mean, sure, work isn't as important as spending time with you. It's raining money anyway what's the point of work? I can just go seduce my boss with a couple of words and you'll see how we'd buy an entire house made of money."

"You shut it right there…" He warned.

"No. No, I should just be okay with you spending time with Mikasa, while I work for both of us to save money for our wedding, because it happens that you, honey, had a car accident a few months ago and needed some time off. I should totally understand that whatever I'm doing isn't as important as keeping you amused. Actually, I shouldn't even have called out today for your sake. You have Mikasa to spend your time with. Silly me, thinking I'm doing you a favor by leaving my job to have some time with you, when, obviously, I ruined your plans for the day. I'm so sorry. You know, I'll just leave you two together to spend the rest of the day without me getting in the way."

Wrathfully, Petra clasped her handbag and drew her way to the doorway to leave, but before she'd manage to, she felt a tight grasp around her wrist.

"Petra, wait…" Levi pulled her back.

"Don't touch me." She pressed her hands to his chest and pushed him off, slipping her hand out of his hold. She shot a glare at him warningly, backing away with slow steps, "Don't come after me. Go back to her. You're here to see her after all. Also, I would really appreciate it if you spent the night somewhere else. Well, I don't think it'll be that hard to find a place anyway. You could spend the night with her and share a bed with her and fuck her all you want. I should try and understand that too."

"Now you're just talking bullshit." Levi's tone rose, drawing some people's attention to them.

"Oh? Am I, Levi?" The way her words came out, the way her eyes sharpened, and the way she smiled and shook her head, all of it left Levi stunned. She knew and he was sure of it. She knew ever since the moment he walked to their suite last night. Not even after that employee brought his tie back was she convinced. But she closed her eyes and pretended not to see. There was no need to argue anymore. And Petra left when seeing he dropped the argument, leaving Levi surrounded with curious gazes, which he threatened with a glare.

"I'm sorry." He felt a hand on his shoulder from behind, and heard Mikasa apologizing, "Maybe I shouldn't have come, after all. I didn't mean to cause trouble—"

"I thought we agreed to stop apologizing." He cut her off immediately, his voice not showing any affection.

"Yes. But not to the point where-" She was cut off again by the severity of his gaze when it met hers.

"Forget about it."

* * *

Knuckles turning white from the tight hold on the steering wheel, eyes fixed on a road which appeared to be nothing but the way to hell, there was only one image playing on repeat in Petra's head; the image of Levi with Mikasa, her fiancé with another woman. She gave in to anger. She'd had enough with paying patient. She'd had enough with playing dumb, acting ignorant, avoiding all the sorts of problems her relationship with Levi could go through. She'd been silent about a lot of things, for countless times, and she only hoped for him to do the same. She had waited for him to see all her efforts, appreciate them and maybe start putting efforts into their relationship to work. But all she'd ever gotten from him was the impression of being his source of annoyance. She'd wanted to ask him, ' _Why did you propose to me? Why does it feel like you don't care? Do you even love me? Do you even feel anything for me?'_  But she'd come to think it would sound dumb and unnecessary, always coming back to the conclusion of how clumsy Levi was in expressing his feelings. She wouldn't want to make him feel nervous, pressured, and she'd shut her curiosity to know the answer just for him.

The further she thought about it, the more she increased the speed of her car. Rushing and hurrying to go back to lock herself in a room, to have a chance to reconsider the choices she had made. He did not deserve what she'd done for him. All her efforts went in vain and realizing it so late was creating a cloud of regret and shame fogging her mind and sight. She woke up at the sound of a car veering off the course, finding herself advancing in the direction of another one behind it. She gasped, and made a quick turn to avoid the crash, only to run to another car. Panicked, she hit the pedal. Her eyes shut, and all she could think of was death waiting for her. She heard some noises around her, but nothing hit her car, and she opened her eyes when everything stopped. She was safe.

Terrified, Petra rested her head on the steering wheel, her eyes watering and the tears dropping on her lap. Both scared and upset, the near-death experience she just had had her losing consciousness. And people who had been watching, rushed to help the car drivers.

* * *

"You… you really are tough, aren't you?" After several minutes of watching her exercising on the nautilus machine, Levi got impressed. She was a strong, energetic woman. Pulling the weights seemed so easy just by looking at her.

"I told you, I'm used to going to the gym. Just because I haven't been into one for a while, doesn't mean I've forgotten how to exercise." She smirked, holding her laughter at his surprised expression.

"How hard can you punch?" He asked out of curiosity.

"What?" She raised a brow at him.

"Let's try. I want to know." Levi stepped out of the nautilus machine.

"Okay." Mikasa followed Levi as they both stood away of the training machines. He handed her a pair of boxing gloves while he wore the focus pads.

"Let's see how strong you are." He challenged, holding out the focus pads to her.

"What's the point of this anyway?" She shrugged, faking disinterest.

"I think it's the best way to let out your rage. If there's someone you hate, and really want to punch but can't, this is the best way to do it." He explained with sarcasm, "But if you'd like to get scientifically…"

"Can I imagine Petra?" She cut him off.

"Petra?..." He exclaimed, "You hate her?"

"Not exactly hate, I just really wanted to punch her." Though she must admit, she did feel a little bit of guilt after she left, but that wasn't enough to change her mind about wanting to punch her.

"Go ahead." He permitted, giving her the signal to start. Mikasa's eyes focused on the pads, and she swung a punch at one of them almost too weakly, but not quite. "You call that a punch?" He mocked, and she rolled her eyes at him, "Come on. I know you can punch harder than that." Before he finished, she shot another punch, stronger, but still not what he'd expected. "Is that it, Mikasa?" She directed several punches, each felt harder than the previous, but Levi wasn't satisfied. He wanted more, more rage, more strength-more. "Look at me. Look into my eyes." She complied and he continued, "It's me, your fiancé, who cheated on you, who lied to you and promised to marry you but then left you for someone else. Don't you want to punch me so hard till you break every bone in my face? Don't you, Mikasa?"

His words were the spark that set fire in her eyes, sending the force into her bones. She was clutching her fists harder till she almost stopped feeling her knuckles. If Levi had thought her expression was scary, it was definitely nothing compared to the one he saw now. She resumed the punching with full strength, and she swung her fists to the focus pads, strong and aggressive. Levi was almost stepping back, but he stood still, receiving countless punches again and again. He could now feel it, the real anger she was hiding within, it could create a monster.

"Now that's what I call rage." He said, and he saw her looking at him before focusing her eyes back on the focus pads.

Between cut breaths and punches, Mikasa began to talk, "I just…wish to have a chance…to make him… drink from the same cup… make him go through the same pain… perhaps then, he'll understand what's it like to love someone who's only playing around with your feelings, to let them be your everything, while you're nothing but a fucking toy to them."

Levi listened, carefully, keeping his mind focused on both her punches and words, and just then, he realized how honest and determined she was, but also how broken and fragile she'd been.

"You gain so much strength from hatred." The words left his mouth in a bitter voice.

"…That's all I've learned from life…" She admitted.

"It's because you're too afraid of love, because it makes you weak." He took a guess.

"Wrong." She punched and he dodged, feeling the difference in the punch, "It's because no one needs strength when they find love. Because…" She loosened her grip, and dropped her hand, eyes looking down, "Because there's no strong and weak in love. You feel equal, even… but once that special bond is broken, nothing looks the same anymore." She clenched her fist again, "And it turns out that the world you've built was nothing but a fantasy, its walls made up of lies…" And she punched again.

"If they were lies, then how come you truly experienced them?" Levi was trying to provoke her, to make her give it her best, to let out all she'd been keeping inside.

Mikasa paused, taking a break to regain her breaths and give him a proper answer, "You only experience what you believe is real."

"Oh?"

"For example; a child doesn't know what fear is, unless you teach them, show them. Otherwise, they'd grow up without fears. They would never experience what fear is, unless they believed in it." She gave further explanation to her point of view, and he listened to her carefully.

"You're saying that fear doesn't really exist?" He concluded, hinting a smile from her.

"What are you afraid of?" She resumed punching, and he matched her with dodging each of her punches.

His mind took off in a small drive of thinking, whether he had any fears, but nothing came to his mind except for one thing, "Nothing in particular, I still… can't drive a car without having flashbacks from the accident, which is why I avoid driving, but that's not an actual fear."

"You're afraid of the consequences, the possibility of having another accident, I see. I'm afraid of trust." She confessed.

"Trust?" He questioned, asking for more details.

"Yes." She paused again to wipe the sweat off her forehead, "But, I have a rule to work by, so it makes it less scary for me."

"Hm! What's that?" His curiosity was stolen, once again. No matter how much he knew about her, he would always seek to know more.

"Trusting myself more than anyone." she gave him an answer, only to increase his interest more, "Before coming to trust someone, I've learned to trust myself first, so that if ever someone turns out to be untrustworthy, I won't be so hurt, because in the end, I…"

"…still have someone to trust, that is  _you_." He finished her phrase, receiving a confirming nod from her.

"Exactly!" She smiled at his guess.

"Sort of complicated but makes sense." He removed the focus pads and placed them back in their place.

"It's only complicated if you believe so." Mikasa did the same with the boxing gloves. Silence took place as the two exchanged secret gazes, both wanting to talk but hesitating to.

"Levi,... why did you stay?" Mikasa initiated, "Why didn't you go with Petra?"

Her question was already answered in his mind, but it took him a couple of seconds before he speaking it, "Because… if I left, I would be caged in a world of fantasy, its walls made up of lies."

Mikasa could hint sarcasm in his answer, having her wondering if he truly meant what he said, "… You think you're funny?"

"There's a fine line between 'funny' and 'honest'." He was honest.

She knew he was honest, and his honesty was raising even more questions, "What are you really afraid of?" She had assumed he was afraid of the consequences, but, "If you were afraid of the consequences of your actions, you would have left with her, because you'd be concerned for the affect it might have on your relationship."

"I might have also been afraid of the consequences for not staying." Truthfully and confidently, he continued, "The things I would miss if I left with her, like having a chance to know more about you."

There was a fine line between 'funny' and 'honest', and a fine line between him and her. Nevertheless, Levi was crossing the line so inconsiderably of the things that would come after, "She's your future. And I'm soon going to be in the past. You should rearrange your priorities." The circumstances of their meeting had been so strange, so mysterious but so interesting. They were developing interest in each other, which was growing to something bigger than just interest between two strangers. It was attraction and last night approved it. It was lust and their eyes spoke with it whenever they met. It was unspoken because their kisses said it all.

"Or I should use the chances life gives me, before they soon become from the past." He was challenging her, and he wouldn't do so unless he knew she would accept it.

"Levi—you don't make sense at all." He was messing with her, and she loved it, loved him for it. Being dared to reach the unreachable, to do things she would regret later but love and enjoy in the meantime.

"I don't make sense if that's what you believe." He shut her up with her own comeback, and made sure to steal her chance to complain with a forceful kiss.

She didn't know how his hand landed on her neck, just felt herself leaning forward to meet his lips. She wasn't a fan of kissing in public places, but with him, she'd do even more without minding. But she enjoyed teasing him, and broke the kiss, "You—I see how it is now."

He smirked, maintaining a respectful distance between them, "Enough exercising, what do you want do now?"

"I'm—I'm kind of hungry. Shall we go have lunch in a restaurant?"

"Alright. Let's just take a quick shower before leaving."

A few minutes passed and they were already in the car, Mikasa driving to the nearest restaurant in the area. It was all silent until Levi received a phone call. He slid a hand to his pocket and pulled his cell phone out. It had Petra's name on the screen, and he heaved a sigh before answering it, "Yes, Petra?" There was a quick change in his expression from annoyed to concerned, the sharpness of his gaze vanishing as his eyes widened. "What?... Where?... Okay, yeah! Thanks for letting me know. I'll be there soon." He hung up.

"Is there a problem?" Mikasa was also concerned after hearing his tone.

He gulped, "Petra's in the hospital."

"Hospital? W-What happened?" Shocked, Mikasa's eyes widened.

"I don't know. They said she almost had a car accident, but she didn't hit anything. They said she was just unconscious and they had to take her to the hospital to make sure there was nothing wrong." He explained nervously, tucking the phone back in his pocket.

Mikasa obliged to change their direction to the hospital then, only to arrive a few minutes later. They asked the receptionist before heading to the first floor where Petra supposedly should be. They walked till a woman and a guy stood up and walked straight to them.

"Are you Levi?" The woman asked.

"Yes?"

"Hello, I'm the one who called you." The woman introduced herself, "This is my husband. We drove her to the hospital."

"Is she alright? What happened?"

"The doctors just took her to her room. Don't worry about her. Like I said, she avoided the accident luckily and she might have lost consciousness because of the shock."

Levi was going to ask more when he finally saw the doctor walking out of the room, and he walked to him instead, Mikasa and the couple following him.

"Is she okay now? What was wrong?" He asked in concern.

"No worries, sir. Your wife is alright. She will have to stay here for a little while, just to make sure nothing went wrong." The doctor smiled comfortingly, reassuring him.

"She's not my wife. She's my fiancée. What happened to her?" He questioned.

"Your fiancée? Oh, sorry. We—we thought she was married because… well…" The doctor stuttered to finish.

"Well?" Levi pressed.

"She was pregnant." The doctor stated.

"What?" Levi exclaimed in disbelief.

" _Was_  pregnant?" Mikasa added.

"Sadly, she lost the baby. She wasn't injured at all. But chances are that she hit something when trying to avoid the car the crash. Perhaps when she hit the pedals and the sudden stoppage of the car caused her to bump into something. The shock might have affected her as well. She was only one-week pregnant anyway." The doctor explained the situation to Levi, whom still appeared to have a problem believing it.

"Are you  _sure_  she was pregnant? It can't be—I mean, she's been on the pill and…" unconvinced, Levi needed a confirmation, which most likely, even if he got, he would still deny it.

"It happens. You can't depend 100% on the pill. We're sure she was pregnant. You may see her now." The doctor nodded and walked away, leaving a shocked Levi in denial. Mikasa watched him the whole time in silence. She saw how concerned he was for her, but she also saw the way he refused to believe her pregnancy, and she wondered about his true feelings for Petra. Did he love her? Did he hate her? Did he feel guilty? Did he feel sympathy for her? She couldn't tell, but nevertheless, he was nervous and she placed her hand on his shoulder to comfort him.

"Well, since everything is good and she's fine, there's no need for us to stay. Excuse us." The woman excused herself and left with her husband.

"Let's go see her." Mikasa encouraged the hesitant Levi, and she saw him look at her from over his shoulders, before walking to the room. She followed him.

Levi peeked from behind the door at the sleeping Petra, hesitating for a few seconds before walking into the room. Pulling a chair near the bed, he sat down next to her.

The silence was eerie, and all Mikasa could see in Petra at that moment was herself, when she was once lying on that bed that one night. She didn't look at her the way she did in the gym. She looked at her with sorrow and pain in her eyes, the pain she'd felt and was still feeling after all this time. That pain was much scarier than the silence in the room.

"I… I can understand what she must be going through. I was pregnant once too." Mikasa said, taking a seat next to Petra on the bed.

"I'm wondering… whether she knew or not, and whether she was going to tell me if she knew—I'm wondering about a lot of things. One thing I'm sure of is that, no matter what her answer will be, I won't fully believe it." It was too late to fix anything. He'd never be able to look at her the same way he did again, "I'm not sad. I'm actually grateful, because just the thought of having a child now is freaking me out. It's not because I don't want kids—it's because I don't think I want kids… with her." He confessed harshly.

"Levi—"

"Maybe I really made a huge mistake when I proposed to her. Everything feels so wrong now. I haven't thought through it well. If I did, perhaps I would have realized this earlier." He should have known when he proposed to her, that they were not meant to be. He should have known whenever they made love, because he never felt love for her. He was grateful, but not in love. He wanted to thank her, but not devote his life for her.

"What are you even talking about?" Mikasa couldn't state an opinion either. It was his life, his choices to make. But she wasn't sure if she truly wanted him to leave Petra.

"I don't want to marry her. Trust me. I'll do her a big favor if I don't. She's a nice woman, and she needs someone who'd treat her the way she deserves and I know I won't, because I don't want to be with her. If I marry her, I'll hate her, and make her life—both our lives miserable. It would be too late to realize it then, and it's not too late now." He could still fix it, "I can still fix things now. I'll let her get the rest she needs, and once she's ready to leave the hospital, I'll break up with her."

"Are you even listening to yourself?" Mikasa queried.

"Yes. And I should have listened to myself a long time ago, but I kept ignoring what I truly wanted, because I thought it's unfair to her. But now I realize I've always been unfair to her. Now, I'm going to listen to myself and do what I really want. I appreciate what she's done for me, but I can't give her the happiness she deserves, neither can she give me the happiness I need." Their relationship was shoved down their throats and it was hard for them to swallow. Levi had no intention to carry on with this torture, and he decided to leave back to the hotel. "Let's go."

Levi beat Mikasa to the door and left, as she stayed there just for a few more seconds, observing Petra with empathy. She followed behind Levi, and once the door closed, the tears Petra had been holding the entire time were finally released.

Levi got back to the hotel with Mikasa, and they headed straight to the elevator and back to their suites.

"So, do you want to have lunch or…?" Mikasa paused at her door to ask him. They were supposed to go have lunch in a restaurant but they had to cancel it.

He had so many things in mind at the time but food, and he felt sorry to decline her offer, "I lost my appetite. Now, I just want to sit and think calmly about… so many things."

"Okay, then, I understand. You need to rest. Take care." Mikasa turned around and opened the door, but before she'd go inside, Levi called her.

"Let us meet for dinner tonight." That should make up for their canceled lunch.

She turned back to look at him, "Sure." Mikasa gave off a nod and watched him leave before she walked into her suite. Once the door shut, she leaned against it. There was a slight glistening in her eyes, the words she'd heard from Levi today replaying in her ears. What he told her in the gym, what he told her in the hospital, and most of all, the unspoken words their kiss held. She'd been forbidding herself from sharing just passionate moment with anyone for the last six months that she'd forgotten how amazing it felt. A sudden realization snapped into her; Levi did not want to be with Petra. Somehow she wasn't that surprised because she knew, but it was more of a relief to hear him say it. She wouldn't be haunted by guilt if she surrendered to her desires—in fact, the only thing that would make her feel guilt was not using what little time she still had to share more of those moments with him. No more hesitance, just selfishness.

They met each other again on dinner. Mikasa arrived earlier and waited for him to come—because she thought she made him wait enough already—They took their seats in front of each other, and waited for their preordered dinner while having a small chat.

"How are you feeling now?" She thought it was unnecessary but still wanted to ask. He looked so much better.

"Better… and hungry." He hadn't eaten anything. He had no appetite to till now.

"Good, then you'd better eat well now." And to shut her curiosity, she decided to ask, "So, have you called her?"

"No." said Levi nonchalantly.

"Oh!"

"What?"

"You're supposed to ask about her. She only had a miscarriage today." She rolled his eyes at his unbelievable carelessness.

He attempted to reply but the waiter arrived to save their food and he preferred to get to the good stuff rather than talking about the same subject over and over. He had spent his entire day thinking about it and he wasn't planning to keep doing so for the entire night.

"Anyway, I'm hungry, like I said." Levi began to eat, and Mikasa did the same as she saw he wasn't up to discuss the matter with her. But she placed her fork down to talk.

"How long are you staying here?"

"Till the end of the month, maximum, but mostly before Christmas." Not that he planned anything special for Christmas either way.

"Oh! Same as me," There was still time in their hands, and it made her relieved, "I would stay here till the end of the month, but my friend will be so upset if I don't spend Christmas with her. But, I really like this place. I might come back from time to time."

"Give me a call when you do. It'd be nice to meet here some time." Even though they've only been here for a few days, Levi spent a good time in her company, memories which will stay safe with him, memories that gathered in a necklace he still put around his neck. Memories not only he cherished, but so did Mikasa.

* * *

_"If you were afraid of the consequences of your actions, you would have left with her, because you'd be concerned for the affect it might have on your relationship."_

_"I might have also been afraid of the consequences for not staying."_

_"…"_

_"The things I would miss if I left with her, like having a chance to know more about you."_

_"She's your future. And I'm soon going to be in the past. You should rearrange your priorities."_

_"Or I should use the chances life gives me, before they soon become from the past."_

* * *

Words she'd never forget, never erase, words that were now so precious. Words she thought were crazy before, but found so sweet now, "We should…"

Their eyes met and his hinted something else in them, "What is it?"

And if he could answer her with her answers, she could definitely do the same, "We should use the chances life gives us, before they soon become from the past." Once more chance, "You were right." That was all she needed, "If I… If I invited you again… to my suite, tonight…"

"So you can kick me out again?" He mocked.

She shook her head and smiled faintly, "So we can use the chance of being alone… so I won't feel this guilt anymore, and so…"

"We can have dessert…" He finished.

"And enjoy it…"

Only staring into each other's eyes got them excited and even almost canceling dinner to get straight to the dessert, but they controlled their impatience for a number of minutes till they finished having dinner. They were counting the minutes they took to finally get to Mikasa's suite, and even when they did arrive, they were still containing their impatience, and simply decided to sit on the couch, the couch which still brought back those hot moments to life.

"So—" Levi proceeded to talk.

"Would you like some wine?" But Mikasa cut him off with her sudden suggestion, and she stood up to get the bottle of wine.

"I—I prefer not to drink tonight." He watched her nevertheless bringing the wine bottle and a glass for herself, pouring the drink into it and holding it up to drink, "Are you nervous?"

"… No." She claimed and he stole the glass from her hand to place it down on the table.

"Then stop drinking." He knew her, how she'd only drink when she was nervous. And despite denying it, he knew she was nervous now too.

"Alright." She brushed her hair back with her fingers and met his gaze.

"Well…" He fixed his seating position, and before he said any additional words, he was, again, cut off.

"Let's talk." She made another suggestion, and Levi began to wonder whether she was trying to procrastinate.

"Talk?" He was sure as hell that was not the purpose of inviting him to spend the night here.

"Yes, talk. Tell me… about… your… uh… family, maybe?"

"Family?"  _What?_

"Yes."  _I screwed up, didn't I?_

"Family…"If she needed time, he would give her that, and he would tell her about what she wanted to know anyway, so he began to talk, "Okay, family. I—honestly I have no idea what to tell you about my family. My parents are dead. I don't have any siblings, and both sides of my family have conflicts. I didn't want to get involved so I left. There really isn't much I could tell you about my life. I've spent most of the nights drinking in bars and getting wasted. God, I can't even remember what happened last Christmas."

"I've spent it with my fiancé—ex-fiancé." Her gaze softened and her tone sweetened distinctly at the warm memory, "He… He proposed to me that night. It was the best Christmas night I've ever spent in my whole life. Even though that relationship failed, I still feel happy just thinking about those memories and how… how realistic they felt."

A frown managed his face, the smile he'd longed to see on her was finally there, but he was not the reason and it made his heart itch in jealousy, "Let me ask you this; do you have any pictures… with him?"

"Gosh, no! I got rid of them all after what happened. Even if I wanted to keep any, my friend wouldn't have let me. She literally discarded everything that would remind me of him." She might have gotten rid of the pictures, but she would never be able to get rid of those feelings, those memories and that pain, and everything he caused to her, but that was one way to forget, even for a short time, that he existed.

"Too bad." He sighed, "I wanted to see his face. Like they say; the world is small and maybe I'd happen to meet him one day. It'd be such a big pleasure to give him a hard punch on the face."

"Oh,  _really_?" her eyebrows rose in disbelief.

"Really." He confirmed with a nod and a wide smirk.

"Why would you even do that?" For someone she met in a hotel, it sounded more like an act her boyfriend would do (if she had one).

"Because… Despite the time we've spent together was quite short, I'm pretty sure you're not the kind of girl who deserves to get cheated on." Levi was never all that dreamy person. His interests were afar to believe in wishes and asking for second chances and such. But Mikasa made him become the opposite of his person. Only one chance was he all he wanted to get from her, and he would show her how, if he could have been her fiancé instead, he would be the hand that holds onto hers and never leaves her. He was astonished by how dumb and crazy she made him feel.

"And…" Impressed but not convinced, she added, "Is Petra… that kind of girl?" There was no answer he could give and Mikasa took it as an evidence of his hesitance and uncertainty. Mikasa left his side and got up, refusing to go further with the discussion, but Levi's hand grasped her arm strongly, pulling her back to fall on his lap.

"Not this time, Mikasa." His words came out in a hot breath, tickling the insides of her ears. "You're not going to use Petra as an excuse. I've already said I'm breaking things off with her, so why should I wait till then? My relationship with her is over." His voice was deep, tantalizing the buried urges within her and shaking the depths of her caged heart, her chest beginning to move up and down in rushed, insecure breaths. His nose nuzzled her hair, taking in a deep inhale to steal her pleasant scent, giving her no time to figure out an answer to her question; did she want him to touch her? The question remained unanswered as his free hand grasped and pushed her hair to the front, uncovering the back of her neck and drawing his lips urgently to press against her skin, warmly leaving a ghost kiss, stimulating a soft sigh from her. Her voice was law and insufficient to drench his wants to hear more. His teeth snapped at her skin tenderly, forcing a gasp out of the depths of her throat. He smoothed the spot he bit with his tongue, finally hearing a moan escaping her; she preferred licking. He took note of that and continued his journey to discover the millions of undiscovered things about her.

Her head tilted to the side, giving his tongue more room to explore. His tight grip slowly disappeared around her wrist, which she soon took advantage of to push the back of his neck and press his mouth harder to her. She was driven into the act despite her uncertainty to make any move with him before his relationship with his fiancé was officially over, but it was undeniable for both of them that they desired each other, irresistible now that they had a taste of each other's touch. His lips surrounded her skin, giving it a gentle suck. She hissed and moaned and he did it again to get more of her. He felt her fingers pulling at his hair like she wanted to tear his locks off his scalp. It was painful but bearable, and he kept on shifting from licking to sucking to licking again, winning palatable moans from her in return.

Mikasa was not a submissive woman, even with Levi forcing his dominance on her, she would not submit to him without a taste of revenge (Hearing him moan under her touch, if she could call it revenge). Her bottom pressed to his hips tauntingly, creating an arousing contact. He swallowed a hiss, but he could not prevent her from sensing his hardness through his pants. Pleased by both the sensation of his erection pressed to her ass, and his low itching voice, Mikasa repeated the same motion, her bottom moving against his erection, successfully stealing small breaths and groans from him. It was pleasant but unfair, and he wanted to equalize it, his hand found a way under her skirt, tracing the soft skin of her inner thigh and trailing the straps of her underwear before sliding underneath. His finger found her bundle of nerves and pressed it ghostly, repeatedly and teasingly, having her shaking and unintentionally, causing his erection to harden even more.

"Levi—ah!" Mikasa gasped in a short breath, his touch had her on the edge of her seat, demanding more contact. Her thoughts fused to become a pure craving of his hands on her body. His finger flicked her clit, transmitting a storm of forgotten feelings; the pleasure and the ecstasy she hadn't felt for long. Her refusal to surrender with ease to this bliss and her violent urge to take more than give drove her hips inward and backward persistently, rubbing herself against his fingers once and pressing to his arousal another.

Levi struggled to keep his mind focusing on fingering her, instead of surrendering to the pleasure he received from her constant teasing. With the use of two fingers, Levi spread her folds open, enhancing the friction of his finger against her clit. The intensity of the pleasure caused her hips to rock at the development of a staggering amount of relish. Between gasps and hisses and hot breaths, they danced in their seats. He stimulated her clit with faster and harder rubbing. Her head fell back on his shoulder, lips separating from one another to draw the way out for loud moans. Levi used the chance to take her earlobe between his lips, keeping a steady pace of sucking and fingering. He whispered leisurely, "Are you enjoying this?"

"L-Levi, d-don't slow down—ah!" The words left her mouth in a desperate, needy tone, not giving him a second choice and obliging him to comply and rub her bud faster contently.

"Like this?" He asked with tease in his tone and flicked her bundle of nerves quicker, his eyes watching the change of her visage fussily, as if he were afraid he would miss any of her turned-on expressions. He could tell she was enjoying it rather too much to be able to concentrate on talking. The way her lips parted to let a moan out, then her teeth bit on her bottom lip and eyebrows furrowed. And the urge to kiss her was rushing through him. When he felt her releasing an amount of liquid, he used the opportunity to rub around her slit, sliding his finger in.

"Fuck—mm—yes, yes!" She cried out, feeling his finger moving in circles within her, stretching her and then pulling out of her to slide in again. He repeated the action with a quickened pace.

Levi saw her as a puzzle he had yet to figure out how to bring its pieces together to get the full image, but each time he thought he was close to finish it, he remembered there was a missing piece that he had yet to find. The questions roaming in his head were just as countless as the times he'd love to fuck her, and he would take his whole time doing so. But the sooth of having her moaning to his touch was an accepted answer to most of his questions. She was with him when she could have been with anyone else. He was touching her when anyone else could have been doing it. It disgusted him to think about it, so he loved to cherish that moment. "How long has it been since you let a guy touch you?" His curiosity tugged again, and her eyes opened after good three seconds of hearing the words leaving his mouth bitterly with a taste of jealousy. His eyes sought for an answer in hers, fishing a smirk in the curves of her lips and a soothing look behind the grayish shade in her eyes.

Her fingertips lowered his head and her lips grazed his, "You're the first one in a very long time." She murmured, reassuring him and shutting his curiosity. Their lips fused together in haste, curing the wounds of a broken heart with temporary pleasure. Love was not what they needed from each other in the end. They were attached in a special bond, attraction. The attraction they could not hide. The one they hunted in one another's gazes. His lips linked to hers ravenously, his finger going in and out and back in, the tempo increasing slowly as well the pleasure. Her lips obliged to part from his, allowing an escape for the moans suppressed in her throat.

The constant thrusting of Levi's finger was building a strong orgasm inside of her, and her knuckles whitened from tightly holding onto the couch, like she was holding on to a horse's reins so as to not fall. Two more thrusts, and her release was forcing its way out, "God, Levi—" Her hips trembled in his lap until her orgasm finished and her moans turned into gasps to even her breathing. Her back pressed to his chest, seeking for his comfort.

Levi's hand found its way out from underneath her panties, his fingers stuck into his mouth as his tongue licked them clean. Counting the seconds it took her to even her breaths, both his hands settled on her hips, shifting her weight onto the couch and laying her on her stomach. Levi's eyes scanned her body painstakingly, drawing invisible lines of a nude painting to draw an analogy of the real but unseen naked girl, curiously measuring the accuracy of his expectations by resting a palm on her back and tracing the curves of her body with it, going to her front to touch her breasts then lower to her stomach and back to her hips then thighs, going under her skirt to squeeze her ass before sliding her underwear down to her mid-thigh and pulling the skirt to her waist.

 _So perfect._ He thought when finally done examining her figure, though he would still have to do it again after taking her out of her clothes.

Mikasa's heart beat exceedingly when Levi's palm was exploring the different parts of her body, a pinkish tint striking her cheeks as his hand explored lower, the tint reddening when her panties were removed and her ass was exposed. Her eyes closed, and she buried the lower part of her face in the pillow, waiting to know what his next move would be, and the things he was thinking about doing to her. Whether it would be dirty, or tender, it didn't matter to her.

"I really do hope you're protected." Levi sat up on one knee, waiting for a response from her before making another move. Though, in reality, he didn't care if she were protected. But he hoped her answer would still be yes just for reassurance.

Mikasa nodded, pulling away from the pillow to answer him, "Of course I am." She would be lying if she said she wasn't expecting this to happen sooner or later. Mikasa was sure that, eventually, she would end up fucking this guy, and not only because she planned for this night to end up like this, but she'd been on the pill for a while. Things happen and she'd better be ready at all costs.

"I would still fuck you either way. I have no patience to go bring a condom." Levi sneered, hearing a muffled chuckle from her.

"I wouldn't mind either." Mikasa admitted, giving Levi a signed authority to do all he desired with her.

Receiving her approval, he unbuckled his belt, unzipped his fly and unbuttoned it, before pulling his pants and boxers to his mid-thigh. "I'll take all my time with you. We have an entire night in our hold, and thousands of things we can try." He worded his intention decisively, pressing the head of his cock to her ass, and preparing to thrust in (Her prior orgasm moistened her entrance enough to ease his way in). With careful eyes, he calculated the safest pace and angle as he began to push his length through slowly and cautiously, remaining subtle and dexterous so as to avoid harming her.

Mikasa's fits clutched sturdily on the couch, her taut insides stretching the further he pushed through. Her teeth gritted to contain the cries of pain she needed so urgently to release, but her lips parted eventually, and her cries were now only muffled by the pillow she pressed her face harder against. The painful pleasure rushed through her veins, and her vision turned blur while she struggled to adapt his enormous size inside her.

"You're so fucking tight." Levi puffed, averting from proceeding to thrust till making sure she was not hurt.

"I—I'll be fine. Keep going." She stammered, pushing away from the pillow so he could hear her before she rested her head back on it.

"Are you sure?" Mikasa touched concern in his question, and she afforded him a confirming nod before he complied with her wish. "Then, let me hear your voice, Mikasa. Let me know you're loving this." Tightly but gently, Levi's fingers wrapped around a lock of her silk-like hair, yanking it back and distancing her face from the pillow. A sudden gasp escaped her as he pulled her hair, but she sealed her lips again, only to part them again when he resumed thrusting, her tightness and his bulkiness liberating a constant wave of eagerness.

Levi's free hand held her leg around his waist, adjusting his position to allow himself thrust deeper. His length was lastly fitting inside her, his hips moving slowly to stretch her more. Pulling slowly out, thrusting back in, Levi picked up the speed, his thrusting getting easier.

"Fuck—Levi," Mikasa purred, the pain turning to pleasure and her cries becoming desperate moans.

Levi's hips slammed sorely against her flesh, sweat dewing his forehead and drawing glistening trails on his face. His need to know how he would feel when he entered her was filled, restlessly riding the two of them toward an orgasm.

After several loud screams and aggressive pulls on the couch, her hands covered her mouth to quiet herself, and it was as if he punished her for doing so, hitting a deeper spot with a forceful thrust, pushing her to drop her hands from her mouth and hold on tight to the couch, "Levi—ah—ah, yes, fas-ter…" She pleaded with him, and he irresistibly quickened his thrusting. His hand dropped the leg he was holding around his waist, sheltering her back with his body, guiding his hands over her breasts and stomach. Mikasa brought his face closer, turning her head to join his lips with hers, kissing as they both moaned into each other's mouths. Mikasa's hand guided Levi's to her sex, seeking for a stronger push to hit her second orgasm. His fingers touched her wet bud playfully, but his constant teasing was still not superior enough to lead her to the bliss she could almost see before her eyes. Wrapping her long fingers around his wrist, she removed his hand from her sensitive area, and shoved his fingers to her mouth, teasing the tips with her tongue and moving them in and out on a constant tempo, only conceiving her doing the same thing, but with her mouth around his cock. The arousing thought was the key that opened the door to a powerful orgasm, their hips jerking feverishly , and between stolen breaths and husky groans, their bodies relaxed and ridded of the tightness overcoming them a moment ago.

"Jesus..." Through the sharpness of his voice, Levi supported his weight with his palms, lifting his upper-part from her. His hips moved gradually to pull out of her, his features showing nothing but disturbance over the sticky feeling and the messy sight of the couch. "That's a huge mess."

Mikasa bit back a moan as he withdrew from her, feeling emptiness replacing the fullness instantaneously, "I'm not cleaning that off." She whimpered, her eyes closing sleepily.

"It's too early to think about cleaning. I'm still thinking about getting the bed dirty." He scoffed, tugging up his pants so it wouldn't interfere with his standing.

With the support of her elbows, Mikasa rolled around, laying her back on the couch, her eyes shooting a daring gaze at him. Her lips separated in a composed attempt to make a comment about what he said, but her teeth came in a temporary contact with her lower lip, seductively, instead. Diminishing the distance between them, his lips tied with hers in a tender kiss, as his hands slipped beneath her back and thighs, lifting her from the couch. Mikasa clung to him with her arms around his neck, and she parted her lips from his to turn and glimpse at the object he leaned to pick from the table. "Why are you bringing the wine bottle?"

"Would you rather hear my answer than see it?" His questioned settled a weird feeling in her stomach, storming her curiosity and yearning.

They arrived at the dim bedroom, only a trail of light sneaking through the open door from outside. He placed the wine bottle on the nightstand and dropped Mikasa on the bed, but she trapped his legs between hers, pulling him over her.

"Let's make things fair." Responding to the vital call of her dominant mood, Mikasa's hands snatched his shoulders, reversing their positions and claiming her control back. Her core made a tantalizing contact with his erection, and she estimated the small sound he made under her touch. Poking his cock out, Mikasa lowered her head. Her tongue moved delicately over the head of his cock, tormenting the confined aspiration between repossessing his entire supremacy over her, and surrendering to her touch. Her lips enfolded the head, propelling his entire length into her mouth eventually. Maintaining a deliberate velocity, her mouth tracked the length of his arousal, forward and rearward. Levi's world trembled in delight and gratification, the light strokes of her tongue and frequent sucks escorting him to a near orgasm. "S-Stop…"

"No." Her mouth moved around his length as she spoke in opposition, producing a ticklish stir which led him to release a tiny amount of a salty fluid. She swallowed it with a firm suck, stimulating him enough to finally release.

"Fuck." He groaned, using his elbows to lift himself up.

Mikasa resumed her seating position, wiping the leaks from her mouth with the tip of her index. His hand attained her back, closing the distance between them and pressing their bodies together. Their foreheads touched, noses scratched, and lips sunk into one another's.

"Now, let me answer your question." His statement increased her excitement promptly, their clothes settled aimlessly on the floor of the room as they freed their bodies from them, save for the only material that connected them soulfully and physically, their Wings of Freedom necklaces; a permanent reminder of their not only trip back to childhood innocence, but also of their current state of liberated urges and unleashed desires toward each other.

Keeping their lips connected, Levi laid Mikasa on her back, parting from them to sit on her waist area and get the wine bottle he left on the nightstand.

She was the pure temptation and the utter seduction in an enchanting woman disguise. She was his one and only to get him wasted when all the drinks failed to do so. His teeth tore the plug of the bottle off, spitting it to the ground to land on the pile of clothes they discarded.

Hovering the bottle of wine over her body, the liquid seeped along her neck, shoulder-blades, breasts and stomach. Her fists clutched around the sheets under the cold breeze the wine sent when tracing the curves of her body, and Levi's tongue pursued the trails, evenly, faintly, unhurriedly, sucking the taste of her skin, flavored with the wine. He continued the ay descending, giving her nipple a swift twirl before passing her chest area and abdomen with leisure licks. Her hips trembled sensitively when his tongue passed over them, and the ticklish feeling persisted all the while as she watched.

His tongue flicked her clit once and she gasped, spreading her legs and wrapping them around his shoulders demandingly. She had thought she experienced the pleasure of her life until his tongue was playing with her bundle of nerves, a game she knew she would lose but the consequences were worth it. The immense ecstasy each flick created, and the wild flutter her heart tracked with each suck, hair pulling and head tilting, it was all she wanted and more. Her head fell back, and her knuckles whitened under the tightness of her grasp on the pillow. Just as if she were a time bob, each moment passing was closing up the explosion. One last flick was all, and the time was out.

"God…" Her breathing was uneven as she released the last bits of her orgasm, withdrawing her grips on both his hair and the pillow.

Levi sheltered her body with his, stroking the length of her arm with his palm and entangling his fingers with hers. He relished every small detail of her face, and signed her lips with a kiss to claim an unspoken possession over her.

Her hand strengthened their hold, coming across a disturbing material around his finger. Mikasa's eyes opened to define the identity, and her lips withdrew from his when defining the material to be his engagement ring.

Levi's eyes tracked the way Mikasa's were following, and his chest ached when seeing she was staring at his ring—he should have remembered to remove it earlier, how foolish of him. There was a constant, quick throbbing in his heart, telling him Mikasa was going to ask him to leave, just like she did last night, but his concerns were all defeated when she pulled the ring off his finger, dropping it on the floor and linking their fingers together again.

"Shall we continue?" Mikasa murmured reassuringly. He nodded, lips curved in a faint smile.

The two resumed their journey; warming up for a next intercourse with ravenous kisses and lip biting. Mikasa adjusted her position with the use of her elbows, lifting herself up as Levi prepared to penetrate her. Her legs spread, and he pushed his length through, riding her toward a new heaven of ecstasy, their tongues leading a battle of dominance which turned out to be more of need than a battle to double the pleasure with linked bodies.

* * *

_It did not matter how long these moments were going to last, because all we thought about was the present. The lust and attraction became passion and tenderness. When all we've wanted to do was to fuck, the word seemed too strong, and even inappropriate to describe it. I would say we made love, but there was no love between us. Even if there were, it was only there for one night._

* * *

_To Be Continued._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, let me know your thoughts and expectations for the fic: Next chapter will most likely be the final one!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Let me know your thoughts about the first chapter. A review would be so much appreciated :D I will be updating it soon. The next chapter is ready, just few more edits before I post it.


End file.
